Author: Yowie

On a Tuesday, what’s next? Human sacrifice. Dogs and cats living together. Mass hysteria. Don’t worry, Reds and Wallabies Fan will be back tomorrow with live coverage from the G&GR helicopter reporting on Rocky Elsom’s freeway runner in a Ford Bronco.Kiwi mixed reactions to James O’Connor joining CrusadersIn between provoking disputes between emotionally under-cooked narcissists on Love Island, Nine has found time to reproduce a Stuff article (which we now re-reproduce like massive hypocrites) on Kiwi reactions to the Crusaders signing James O’Connor.“I don’t like it,” were former prop Wyatt “Jim Bowie” Crockett’s words during an SENZ interview last week.…

Hoss is still p!ssing about with essential oils and dream-catchers at the Byron Bay yoga and wellness retreat. He texted me this update:”Bussell Rand, the famous international yoga guru, is inviting participants one at a time to his special overnight tantric cabin. He seems to be starting with the most flexible yoga students, but I hope I get my turn before this thing wraps up on Sunday afternoon.” Wallaroos v Jockettes 12:50am Sunday 13 October 2024RugbyPass reports that Wallaroo Ashley Marsters will create more history this weekend when the backrower becomes the most-capped women’s player in Australian rugby. Marsters has…

Wednesday’s Rugby News sees more Giteau Law flexibility, the imminent end of rugby union in New Zealand, today’s dose of Springbok schadenfreude and the Western Force turning Japanese.Rugby Australia boss ‘clarifies’ Giteau Law.PlanetRugby reports that Rugby Australia chairman Daniel Herbert has used the Old Jedi Mind Trick to clarify the criteria for overseas players to be selected for the Wallabies.In his first year as head coach, Joe Schmidt has selected just one overseas-based player in his squad (Marika Koroibete) who got called into the team ahead of the Rugby Championship campaign. Instead, Schmidt has opted to get to know the…

Wednesday’s rugby news has 7As comments on the aftermath, England considering defence coach candidates, some inward migration to Ireland for a change and this week’s instalment of Grub Watch.7As reflects on Wallabies’ defeat in Argentina.RugbyPass reports that prop Allan Alaalatoa has opened up on what it was like to be inside the Wallabies’ camp after the team’s record 67-27 loss to Los Pumas. In Sante Fe, Argentina ran in 50 points in the second half alone to hand Australia their heaviest defeat ever in Test match rugby.“Yeah, it was tough. There was certainly some disappointment post-game,” Alaalatoa told reporters (and…

The Springboks have reeled in then overtaken the All Blacks’ lead to win 31-27.ExcusesThis write-up is a bit rushed/brief/late on account of a swarm of bees needing to be dealt with for most of the morning (really). Thankfully they were just a swarm of worker bees on reconnaissance for a new nest location in one of the walls of the Yowie house. With no queen bee yet, the swarm will be lured into a newly-placed hive box over the next week or so. The nearest beekeeper to our place is a dead-set legend.First HalfThe white collar criminals (thanks Hambone) got…

Wednesday’s Rugby News is brought to you by a short break in test rugby and Coopers 2024 Vintage Ale. Bad luck if you missed out on your carton, I had to drive 45 minutes north for a bottle shop that still had one.Lolesio chats about Schmidt’s short kicks plansRugby365 reports that Noah Lolesio is fine-tuning his short kicking game as the Wallabies prepare to face Argentina in Buenos Aires on Sunday morning Australian time.In a touring party that includes Tom Lynagh and Ben Donaldson, the 24-year-old Brumby has emerged as the new coach’s first-choice playmaker after not playing a Test…

Wednesday’s Rugby News sees Wallaby discipline under the microscope, Jake White bemoans the loss of Australia’s academy systems, Vermeulen tells us what we already knew and a special “Commie Watch” alert.43 cards in 47 Tests: Wallabies could make it easier for maths fansIain Payten of the SMH reports that the plainest tale of the Wallabies’ defeat in Brisbane for the Wallabies can be traced to the same place it is now always found: the column labelled “Discipline”.Be it via penalty counts or yellow and red cards, the Wallabies’ discipline has been intractably bad for around three years now and the…

Today’s rugby news has women’s Sevens, Wallaby injuries, player movements to the Tahs (for a change) and a Welsh big unit.Superlatives run out for Aussie women’s SevensYou’ll know the results by Wednesday morning. I’m not maniac enough to stay up until midnight and 3:45am for the Aust v Snow Mexicans semi-final and the gold medal match respectively, so here’s an extract from Brittany Mitchell’s ESPN piece on Charlotte Caslick:Eight years ago, Charlotte Caslick created a moment that changed Australian rugby forever.Flying across the pitch in cover defence and smashing United States flyer Victoria Folayan into touch, saving a try in…

It’s not Hoss. You’ll cope. Hoss is currently assisting Newcastle police with their enquiries after a spate of incidents where (allegedly) street performer mimes have been pushed to the ground and kicked a few times before the assailant ran off laughing. Hoss used his one phone call to update the writer and whinge about all the “salad-dodging fat b@stards” the cops had rounded up to stand near him in the identity parade. Hoss will be back next week if his GoFundMe page reaches its bail amount goal. Aussie men’s sevens top Pool B and into Olympic quarterfinals (5am Friday)The ABC…

With so many games it’d be easy to forget that other rugby stuff goes on. Today’s news sees Victoria look at building the base, Australian women’s 15s needing an urgent boost, more recruitment traffic heading from the Tahs, a South African drug lab (the ok kind) and some Georgian scrummaging.Having eliminated all other options, Victorian Rugby turns to grassroots. The Guardian reports that the game in the latte-sipping, morally-and-artistically-superior State is shifting its focus.The closure of the Rebels this year alongside a sorry sequence of reported financial irregularities and political infighting has left local rugby in the doghouse. “The only…

Today’s Rugby News has English line-up changes, more law-change chat, a Wallaby coach being useful and a good bloke to non-selected players just to mix things up, Dunedin ticket sales and some constructive feedback for SBW. Karl will be back next week after he generously agreed to swap weeks so I could attend the South-East Queensland Dolphin Waxer’s Association annual convention. Joe Marler and Will Stuart added to Pommy squad v NZPravda and AAP report that Props Joe Marler and Will Stuart are the only changes to Saturday’s side which beat genius-coached Japan 52-17 in Tokyo, replacing “Commodore” Bevan Rodd…

With the southern hemisphere test season and Olympic sevens about to start, there’s an abundance of rugby news on a Wednesday for a change. Here’s today’s selection. Slipper cleared to returnNathan “I can change my name to Nick if the podcast needs a gimmick” Williamson reports that Wallabies prop James Slipper has shrugged off any concerns around his calf injury as he begins his quest to break the record as the most-capped Wallaby.Slipper missed the end of the Super Rugby Pacific season with the strain picked up during the round 14 clash with the Rebels. “The calf is going well,…

They can’t all be great tag lines. With the Reds out and therefore Super Rugby finished, Wednesday’s Rugby News looks at the Aus U20 and Wales squads named, plus some All Black doom and gloom (oh dear, how sad, never mind).Six debutants selected to Australian Under 20s Pravda reports that Australia Under 20 head coach Nathan Grey has named six fresh faces in his 30-man squad to contest the upcoming World Rugby U20 Championship in South Africa.Australia face Georgia, Ireland and Italy in Pool B and Grey has made sweeping changes in a bid to improve last year’s fifth-placed finish…

Wednesday’s Rugby News sees talk of Sevens superstars moving to fifteens, Tupou cleared, NZ political fractures, a SA coach playing the technicality card and some cheap-shot footage. Caslick & chums consider moving to 15-player gameBrittany Mitchell of ESPN reports that Australian women’s Sevens co-captain Charlotte Caslick as well as several of her teammates have expressed interest in moving into the 15-player game to bolster the Wallaroos for Rugby World Cup 2025 in England.Caslick has previously expressed her desire to switch formats when she re-signed with Rugby Australia in 2022, after she witnessed the Wallaroos’ performance at the 2021 World Cup…

Wednesday’s Rugby News sees law changes, soft treatment for star players, NZ captaincy speculation and South America seen as the solution for both the injury-ravaged Tahs and certain types after VE Day 1945. Makes you think, doesn’t it.World Rugby law changes for faster game stir conspiracy theoriesThe SMH reports that a range of fan friendly law changes, trials and studies were approved by the World Rugby executive this week. Following Super Rugby’s lead to eradicate kick-tennis, the Dupont law offside loophole has been shut, and the dangerous crocodile roll clean out has also been banned.The most significant law change was…

Today’s rugby news has late big hits, Wallaroos named, RA finances, possible career moves and pain in Spain. Samipeni Finau – any later and he’d be pregnantAs noted by Brisney Spears on Monday, on the weekend Tahs fly-half Tane Edmed was flattened by Chiefs flanker Samipeni Finau, continuing the latter’s run of borderline tackles on players just after they have passed the ball.Nine reports that Stephen Hoiles has eased back from his initial criticism. “I’m now sitting on the fence of, yeah, he got it right, but certainly he’ll get it wrong at some stage,” said Hoiles.Morgan Turinui said “I’m…

Today’s rugby news sees Ian Foster head off to Toyota Verblitz, experimentation for the women’s game, a Jordie Barrett Irish sabbatical, Jake White shows his class and create some *ahem* contrast, and David Pocock has come here to chew bubblegum and kick arse, and is all out of bubblegum.Former NZ coach Ian Foster to be big in JapanStuff reports that Ian Foster will take charge at Japanese club side Toyota Verblitz later this year in preparation for the 2024/2025 season.Foster, who will replace former Highlanders and Hurricanes flanker Ben Herring, already has a high profile recruit on his books with gaol…

Hoss had to hand over the Friday’s Rugby News keys due to a medical emergency. Not to worry. At the time of writing, Hoss is lying on his belly in the recovery ward, texting me his game tips after a successful extraction.Let this be a warning for any of us tempted to change a bathroom light bulb by standing on a rickety chair while kitchen condiment bottles are on the floor. I hope the experience hasn’t permanently put you off Worcestershire sauce, mate.Weekend GamesSee all team news in Happy’s Thursday News.Women – Friday 12 April 5:05 pm AEST – NSW…

No one, not even you, will remember if we were good men or bad. Why we fought, or why we died. All that matters is that two stood against many. That’s what’s important. Valour pleases you, Cron… so grant me one request. Grant me revenge. And if you do not listen, then to HELL with you!Wallabies go for Mike Cron level scrum precision The Wallabies coaching team will be increased by one Mike Cron (0.001 millimetres), the former All Blacks assistant coach and renowned “scrum doctor”.The Guardian reports that the New Zealander helped prepare the All Blacks pack for more…

Wednesday’s rugby news sees Joe Schmidt give away some selection clues (maybe), more Rebels drama, the judiciary resembling Arnold Schwarzenegger in the Total Recall woman disguise (“Two weeks”) for Owen Franks, and Stephen Hoiles getting excited early for the Reds. Schmidt, talking about selections Nine reports that newly-appointed Wallabies head coach Joe Schmidt is prioritising Super Rugby Pacific players over Aussies playing overseas, despite Schmidt’s carefully-worded answer not giving much away. Speaking at the announcement of tickets going on sale for the British & Irish Lions Tour to Australia, Schmidt said his priority was on local players. However, that came…