Greetings one, greetings all and welcome to Friday’s Rugby News: The Election Edition. I’d like to start off today by acknowledging the traditional owners of the lands I write from, the Macquarie Bank Commercial Lending & Overdraft Division. I pay my respects to department managers and lending officers, past and present, and hope my application for an increase to my overdraft is successful.
Today we jump down the rugby rabbit hole and start with a ‘Welcome Kiss‘. Dive deep into this weekend’s results with ‘Preferences’ . Look into our golden girls first test in ‘And off we go‘. Discuss a personal matter with ‘JOC itch’. Talk TV coverage in ‘Stan: manning up’. Before putting the cork back in the bottle with ‘Friday’s Goss with Hoss’, imploring you not to vote red, blue, green or teal this Saturday but instead vote #1 The Hosstralia Party.
Welcome Kiss.
Great news from Coinsland this week. The first time since federation they have actually contributed something of any value to the nation. Well, apart from pineapples.
Happy said yesterday that the decision, the process and the outcome were sensible, mature and left nothing but ‘wins’ for all involved. The Reds win by having their coach fulfil his contract and allow them a longer runway to find his replacement. RA win as they get their man and the consistency that we all crave leading up to when St Joe leaves. For me, it’s not just consistency of program, it’s consistency of emotional leadership and messaging as well. Certainly Kiss seems to ride each tackle and pass more than Joe, at least outwardly. But they seem cut from the same cloth, and that can only be good for us all. Also, RA get Joe for another 12 months to grow the team, so Kiss will inherit an even more settled and improved side. At the same time Kiss gets to improve his Reds players as well. Again, a real win-win. And fans and stakeholders win. Consistency of coach and messaging can only lead to more consistency for players and results which in turn grows the fan base. Which in turn helps stabilise, then grow revenue streams and long term footing of the code. Indeed, I’d add that in my opinion, the whole event has been one of the best negotiated outcomes, in any field, I have ever witnessed.
For those who have yet to watch the dedicated interviews with St Joe and Sir Les on Stan, please do. The two obviously share a friendship but, more than that, their views on the clarity around their current roles, their shared vision for the team and the transition and the absolutely identical view on picking players committed to Australia. I tell you what, selection time is going to be interesting for Gleeson, Hooper and Lolesio. Of those three gents the G&GR faithful only had one in their squad anyhow.
RA has rightfully copped a pizzling over the years for many a daft call. But now is not then. Can anyone say anything other than ‘job well done’ with these events? On behalf of all at G&GR, well done RA and the Reds, and welcome Kiss.
Preferences.
Much like your own votes this weekend, this week’s round of SRP is more about who I want to lose as opposed to who I think will win. You can catch all the teams and their injuries in Happy’s Thursday News.
Friday May 2 5:05 pm AEST – Blues v Western Force at Eden Park, Auckland, on Stan Sport
Let’s face it, the Blues are the Drua of NZ, you keep expecting them to come good, but they haven’t, and they won’t. The Force, well they had a good first half last week and were well in the fight and perhaps a wee bit aggrieved by the ‘no try, we’ve checked and it was knocked on’, to ‘wait, it’s a try and we all agree that it is, even though we all agreed that it wasn’t’, fiasco.
The Force will be stronger for the return of skipper Jeremy Williams and welcome back Kurtley Beale to #15 after a horrid injury last year. Mac Grealy can be considered hard done by though with him moving to #11. Grealy has been very consistent this season and is a smart footballer with good skills , good D and a real turn of pace. While I don’t think he’s a Wallaby anytime soon, he wouldn’t be out of place as a development player on the northern tour this year. Besides, people forget that Beale was selected for St Joe’s squad for the two opposed training runs Welsh tests last year.
Fearless Prediction: Force by 8.
Referee: Ben O’Keeffe Assistant Referees: Stu Curran, Jackson Henshaw TMO: Richard Kelly
Saturday May 3 12:05 pm AEST – Fijian Drua v Queensland Reds at HFC Bank Stadium, Suva, on Stan Sport
The Drua are at home this week, as the tiny nation of Thalassophiles host the Reds in Suva. And I reckon the Drua will face a rejuvenated and dangerous Reds side.
I say that because all uncertainty and anxiety for the Reds players and their coaching group has now been removed. They know he’s staying, and they know their program will stay in place. The familiarity of leadership and routine can be a powerful contributor to performance. Now the Kiss news is confirmed, players, coach and organisation can all focus on one thing and I reckon that makes them an even more dangerous opponent. I understand everyone expected the news about Kiss, but to have it linger as it did no doubt caused some lack of focus and uncertainty for all involved.
Reds skipper and #9 Joe Dirt has rediscovered his running game and seems to have more zip in his legs. His passing has improved and, to be fair, it had to. His kicking is still an area of opportunity, but he’s much improved player this year and that’s great for both Reds and gold fans.
The Reds must control the game, kick for touch and kick out well past the line. With Sleepy Lynagh’s booming boot, that should be well executed. Slow the game down, take away quick ball opportunity for the Drua and play at a pace that suits them and not get sucked into island ball that these kava lovers love.
It will surprise no one that Saturday in Suva is expected to be 29 degrees and thunderstorms, which will the suit the Fijians. But that won’t stop the Reds getting up.
Fearless Prediction: Reds by 13.
Referee: Marcus Playlev Assistant Referees: James Doleman, Fraser Hannon TMO: Glenn Newman
Saturday May 3 5:05 pm AEST – Hurricanes v Chiefs at SKY Stadium, Wellington, on Stan Sport
Match of the round for mine. KARL’s Canes at home to the Chiefs, albeit, without D-Mac who is nursing a broken hand. Let’s be honest. The Canes bullied the Brumbies last week. They outhustled, bustled and muscled the Brumbies at their own game.
Corey Toole ended any chance of wearing gold after missing 18 tackles, and those came when he only attempted 13. Andy Muirhead was a speed bump and Tom Wright fared little better. For every inch hard won by their forwards last week the Ponies back three donated it straight back, and then some. In the end, the score probably flattered the Ponies somewhat.
One thing’s for sure the clash of the forwards is going to be brutal. Fast paced, abrasive and bruising. The front row of the Canes outpoints that of the Chiefs, but the second row of the Chiefs outpoints the Canes. The loosies, well that’s a mouth watering ‘carnival of the collision’ in store for us neutrals, and I can’t wait to watch it.
For all of that though, I can’t shake the feeling that the loss of D-Mac and the never ending harassing that Kirifi and Lakai will provide on Chiefs ruck ball will be enough to get the Canes home in this one. With no dog in this fight and being able to watch simply as a rugby fan, I reckon this could be a cracking game.
Fearless Prediction: Canes by 6
Referee: Nic Berry Assistant Referees: Damon Murphy, Jordan Way TMO: Brett Cronan
Saturday May 3 7:35 pm AEST – ACT Brumbies v NSW Waratahs at GIO Stadium, Canberra, on Stan Sport.
The only all Aussie derby of the weekend. The side of goodness and light travel down the highway to the graveyard of honesty, dignity and courage (but good illegal fireworks), the ACT.
Let’s not sugar coat it. The Tahs were putrid against the Drua last outing. They made more mistakes than Donald Dutton on the campaign trail and were more insipid than an Albo press conference (#vote1Hosstraliaparty).
One can only hope that the week off to refresh and recharge will aid in their performance. In some good news, skipper Commissioner Gordon returns for a long injury break to start. Teddy Wilson has been terrific in Jake’s absence and with the Commissioner re-signing with RA and the Tahs for two more years, I hope Teddy stays on so they can have a smooth transition from Gordon to Wilson. Mahe Vailanu also returns from a broken arm injury. Like last year, early doors I had Vailanu making a wider gold squad, until injury cruelled his chances. He was similarly good early this year until his injury. Vailanu will come off the pine as the excellent Ethan ‘Dave’ Dobbins rightly holds onto the #2 jersey.
I said above the Ponies were poor last week, more so because the Canes made them look so and their outside backs decided to play tag against the Canes backs, instead of tackles. There’re minimal changes to the Ponies side this week, with Rory Scott replacing Luke Reimer in the starting side. The Canberran starting forwards are well drilled, methodical and tireless in the endeavours, and must be nullified or at least matched to be any chance. The loss of Charlie Gamble to injury hurts the Tahs, Pom Jamie Adamson went from a rooster against the Chiefs to a feather duster against the Drua, and he must be busy to keep Scott and Reimer away from Tahs ball in this one.
Good line ups across the paddock. Wallaby props against Wallaby props. Sideshow Bob against Clubba Langi Gleeson. Sticky and Feluia against Foketi and the blue heeler, Joey Walton. Lonergan against Gordon. And Reilly, the Ginga Ninja and Caitlyn Jenner up against Tim Allen, Muirhead and John Denver.
Perhaps the Canes showed the Tahs the way to win this one. Send some big bopper traffic down the wider channels, say a 6’5″ Suaalii and co against a 4’8″ Corey Toole for example.
Gus Gardner has the conch for this one, so we should be in for a good game. But only if the TMO formerly known as James Leckie, James Leckie, can be kept out of it. Talk about players being out of form – yikes.
Fearless Prediction: Tahs by 9 and season back on track. That and Nutta buys me another bottle of personality enhancer.
Referee: Angus Gardner Assistant Referees: Matt Kellahan, Graham Cooper TMO: James Leckie
And off we go.
Our golden girls take their first steps into the international arena this weekend when they play Fiji, in Fiji. In what’s shaping as a bumper season for the team, coach Jo Yapp has named a potential six debutantes for this test match.
The Wallaroos will also play (with all games live on Stan – all times AEST):
- Saturday, 10 May v NZ McDonald Jones Stadium Newcastle 3.00pm
- Saturday, 17 May v USA GIO Stadium Canberra 4.55pm
- Friday, 23 May v Canada Suncorp Stadium Brisbane 4.55pm
- Saturday, 12 July v NZ Sky Stadium Wellington 2.00pm
- Saturday, 26 July v Wales Ballymore Stadium 2.00pm
- Friday, 1 August v Wales North Sydney Oval 7.00pm
After these six tests our team flies north for the 2025 RWC in the UK:
The team will then kickoff its RWC campaign:
- Saturday, 23 August v Samoa Manchester 9.00pm
- Sunday, 31 August v USA 4.30m
- Sunday, 7 September v England 2.00am
Some players have injuries and have been left out of the first few games to rest and rejuvenate; some others have been cut from the squad entirely. I will say, though, it’s a terrific looking first squad for the Fiji test and all the Australian sides looked more athletic this year and with improved skills.
With RA investing millions into women’s rugby, with female participation rates booming and with increased exposure to tests and the rumoured expansion of the SRW competition over coming years, I can’t wait to see the evolution of this team and their success.
The teams will play for the newly minted Vuvale Bowl trophy and from all at G&GR, go well and congratulations to the debutantes.
Saturday, May 3: Fijiana v Wallaroos, HFC Bank Stadium, Suva – 3:00pm AEST
1. Bree-Anna Browne (#193 Wests Bulldogs) – 9 caps 2. Katalina Amosa (Southern Districts) – debut 3. Faliki Pohiva (Blacktown Scorpions) – debut 4. Michaela Leonard (#168 Tuggeranong Vikings) – 32 caps 5. Tiarah Minns (#217 Melbourne University) – 1 cap 6. Siokapesi Palu (c) (#194 Rockdale Rangers) – 16 caps 7. Ashley Marsters (#117 Boroondara) – 34 caps 8. Tabua Tuinakauvadra (#200 Tuggeranong Vikings) – 11 caps 9. Layne Morgan (#188 Merewether Carlton) – 29 caps 10. Faitala Moleka (#199 Blacktown Scorpions) – 16 caps 11. Desiree Miller (#204 Eastern Suburbs) – 12 caps 12. Cecilia Smith (#190 Leeton Dianas) – 19 caps 13. Bienne Terita (#195 Randwick) – 5 caps 14. Maya Stewart (#196 Nelson Bay Gropers) – 16 caps 15. Caitlyn Halse (#210 Camden Rams) – 6 caps Replacements 16. Tania Naden (#197 Uni-North Owls) – 19 caps 17. Martha Fua (Blacktown Scorpions) – debut 18. Eva Karpani (#171 Southern Suburbs) – 31 caps 19. Ashley Fernandez (Uni-North Owls) – debut 20. Emily Chancellor (#158 Sydney University) – 23 caps 21. Tia Hinds (Randwick) – debut 22. Trilleen Pomare (#155 Wanneroo) – 33 caps 23. Charlotte Caslick (Wests Bulldogs) – debut
Fearless Prediction: Wallaroos by 19.
JOC itch.
The G&GR tribe has spoken, and JOC3.0 should be in gold. More so, he deserves to be in gold.
Unfortunate news this week for young Crusaders #10 Taha Kemara, who suffered a season ending knee injury when he ruptured his ACL. Now there’s no way I would ever celebrate someone being injured; however, Kemara’s rotten luck could open the door and cement the return to gold for JOC3.0.
With Kemara out JOC3.0 is set to get more game time, including perhaps steering the Crusaders to final glory. And wouldn’t that be rather handy for St Joe and his fellow selectors. A match fit, calm, experienced JOC, who just happens to also be in championship winning form. There’s almost a George Smith-esque air about JOC and his 2025 trajectory. What a redemptive arc it would be: from naughty burger-boy in 2013 to hardened experienced pro guiding us to Lions glory in 2025. It almost writes itself.
Certainly the G&GR faithful had JOC as one of their picks in the Wallaby 34. With more game time, his side assured of a finals place and away from the glare of Oz media, confident, relaxed and winning, the planets have aligned for both JOC and the Wallabies for his recall to the Lions series.
Wouldn’t that be some tale and I bet an itch JOC would love to scratch.
Stan: manning up.
Credit where it’s due. FUX Sports never had the commitment to the code, nor the sheer volume of rugby shows and coverage that Stan has. There’s Between 2 Posts on Mon-Tue. You have Grimace the host and the introduction of ‘The Peacock’, Matt Burke, to the panel this year, along with rugby savant, ‘The Void’, Morgan Turinui, makes for terrific viewing. Wednesday’s offering of Inside Line is always engaging and informative and some great perspective as well.
But riddle me this, Gaggers, where are the female voices? Where’s the dedicated female offering? The ladies game is the fastest growing in the code, so why not their own show, or certainly more air time on existing shows as a runway into this year’s RWC and beyond. You’re welcome, Stan.
Friday’s Goss with Hoss.
Say what now?
Ok, so Wallace Sititi can play rugby, I think we can all agree on that. But, when he appears in stuff.co.nz and credits his injury recovery comeback by saying “I think the grace of God blessed me with a bit of his healing powers,” that’s taking the whole ‘good people make good All Blacks’ thing a tad far. I mean what chances do other sides have? In Richie they proclaimed they had Jesus at 7. Now the big bloke upstairs is helping the ABs out at #8 as well. That only leaves a couple of low ranking, arse kissing angels to help out the Wallabies while the top two guys are busy with the sheep shaggers.
But good luck to him if that’s what he thinks. I think the grace of sour mash bourbon makes me more attractive and interesting, despite all evidence to the contrary.
Exhibit B.
If the above wasn’t a tad rich then this little pearler from Kurtley Beale reminded me of the things that make you go hmmm: ‘But there was something burning inside me deep down to continue to play, finish on my terms, so to speak. Not every great player or any player gets to finish on their terms.‘
What ‘great player’ is he talking about? Nor does it seem he has given up on his Wallaby/BIL dreams. I reckon there’s more chance of Sam Kerr opening a ‘Taxi Elocution and Deportment School for the Oppressed’ than KB wearing gold again.
Wot Joe said.
When asked at Sir Les’ coronation, about the Wallaby selection status of those players leaving as opposed to those players staying, St Joe said: “we will prioritise those staying but clarity is also that nobody is out of the mix. If there is someone that we believe will add value and is clearly outplaying his opponents as far as selection is concerned, we know how tough the Lions are and how deep they are going to go with really experienced, athletic and combative players. So we know that we have to have, as close as we can, the best group to compete with those guys.”
Yep, I don’t know either.
Not a Frenchman in sight.
Coincidentally, the early reports from the German army is good news for rugby fans. The referees have been confirmed for the Lions tour and there’s not a French ref in sight:
- Kiwi Ben O’Keeffe: BOK will referee the opening Test along with the tour match against the Western Force on June 28.
- Italian Andrea Piardi heads into the middle for the second Test and will also officiate the AU/NZ Invitational game in Adelaide.
- Georgian Nika Amashukeli will round out the Tests in Sydney as well as the First Nations and Pasifika XV match in Melbourne.
Congratulations to all three, be a real experience for them to be involved. rugby.com.au has all the appointment news, including what matches the Oz refs are doing.
Buffet Ban.
NSW coach, Chuckles McKellar, has warned his players of the dangers of hotel stays and the allure of the buffet and sleeping in as his side prepares for their critical victory against the Ponies this weekend. Maybe he should padlock a few props in their room methinks. Or at least tell them that when they hit fingernail it’s time to stop eating. rugby.com.au has more.
Keep it in the family.
Both Tasmanian dating advice and another proud rugby success story. New Wallaroos hooker Katalina Amosa, sister of Brandon Paenga-Amosa, will make her Wallaroos debut this weekend and in doing so become just the third brother-sister combination to represent Australia in rugby. Before them were Adiana and Sam Talakai. As well as the OG, current RA President Kristy Giteau and little known brother, Matt.
Congratulations Katalina and to the Paenga-Amosa family, very proud moment I’m sure. Enjoy the experience and go well.
Until next week. Go the Tahs. I would say ‘God bless’, but it seems he’s busy helping the Chiefs.
Hoss – out.
