The Chewsday Chew – Hmmm, it tastes like… (Ep7-24)

Hola Amigos

And a cracking Good Morning Vietnam to all you bright, sparkling rays of sunshine and happiness out there in Commuterville from somewhere in sunny suburbia, or wherever you may be. I hope you’re coffeeed, croissanted, sprinkled with bacon and smelling the cinnamon of another week of frantabulous, brutiful, idyllic and completely unbiased diatribe from yours truly.

As always, now is the time and here is the moment to drop the reminder that this is a fan-run site and any contribution is welcome. So feel free to reach out to me directly with an article, an idea or opinion piece. Or even a spot of constructive criticism if you feel it’s needed. I promise to be a big boy about it. And there’s also the ‘Submit a Story’ option. So feel free to have a crack as the more the merrier. And after being accused of journalism yesterday, I fear I need the help.

Let’s not muck about and crack along.

Nutta’s Aussie Super Team of the Week:

If you played for an Aussie Super team last weekend, you can get picked:

1. Jimmy Slipper – craft and graft from the old stager.
2. Matt Faessler – keeps getting better.
3. Rhys van Nek – his scrum spell was enormous.
4. Lukhan Salakaia-Loto – did a power of work.
5. Nick Frost – just too athletic to ignore.
6. Liam Wright – captain fantastic squeezed out Leota.
7. Fraser McReight – squeezed out The Gambler.
8. Harry Wilson – just on fire at the moment.
9. Tate McDermott – if he would fix his pass…
10. Noah Lolesio – cool and calm, best of the 10s by far.
11. Corey Toole – he’s simply too fast to be ignored.
12. Hamish Stewart – played really well again.
13. Josh Flook – simply so dependable.
14. Harry Potter – I luv a gutsy winger.
15. Andrew Kellaway – starting to really own the spot.
16. Billy Pollard – initially I went to Uelese, but Pollard earned the jersey.
17. Penie Ravai – squeezed out Angus ‘The Hinge’ Bell.  
18. Zane Nongoor – keeping Prime Part Time Tupou out for me.
19. Sevu Uru – indefatigable. He just didn’t stop. Hanigan very unlucky.
20. Bobby V – rock solid for the Donkeys, but Qlders unit too good.
21. Ryan Louwrens – accurate and good decisions.
22. Isi Perese – he’s dangerous for sure. But wild offloads saw him benched vs starting.
23. Marky Mark – great athleticism. Very much a loss to the game if/when he goes.

Comments on the TOTW:

• The Reds backrow is going a long way to shutting others out given their work and balance as a unit is so good. Charlie Gamble played well, Rob Leota was a powerhouse, Bobby V’s numbers were imperious and others are putting up their hands as ever Aussie backrowers do. But it’s the Reds work as a unit that makes the sum of their combination outweigh their individual stats.
• Noah Lolesio is proving himself the form, and thereby Wobbly, No10. As the weeks go by, the calm reliability of his performances, even behind a suspect and underperforming pack, makes his exclusion from RWC23 all the more ridiculous in hindsight. I only hope we can find a no9 to feed him clean, reliable pill (I’m looking straight at you there Tate).
• A big disappointment for me in this team is that Taniela Tupou can’t even make the bench. We all know the bloke’s talent and ability. At his best he’s the most destructive no3 in the world. But as it is he looks distracted, unfit and frankly a bit soft. It’s been said by many smarter than I that the road to greatness is littered with the bodies of talented people and I truly hope BigT isn’t turning into roadkill.

Random Comments Around the Traps:

Welcome aboard to Corbin Holznagel, whose first contribution to these hallowed pages was a write-up on the 2024 Aussie Rugby Club Championship showdown between Randwick and Brothers who duked it out for the Bernie Power Cup. Write-up HERE. Not only was this piece accurate and timely, but it was also set in paragraphs with pics, which made even Yowie happy. It’s grand writing by a welcomed new contributor. However we do have a problem as Corbin needs an avatar. So voting is open, make your contribution or take what you get. My idea is below. 10pts and Hoss to send G&GR merchandise for the first to guess:

EJ v DOA: As per chat from Brissy yesterday, one of the outcomes of the Rugby Australia post-event review into the failure of RWC23 was the citing of Eddie Jones for allegedly spending $2.6million over his allocated budget on the campaign. And true to form, EJ came out swinging in reply in the Weekend Australian to the accusation, saying everything he said or spent was correctly approved. Now for those unaware of how this generally works in most large and/or audited organisations, a fundamental tool of governance that is used each and every day by Accounts Payable and Receivable (the folk who pay/chase money) is a document/policy called the DOA (Delegation of Authority) which sets out the limits of what various folk can or cannot approve or sign-off invoices for. While this may sound like avoidable ‘beauracratese’, DOA means things just don’t happen unless clearances/authority levels are ok’d. It’s serious stuff and messing about with DOA will not only get you shanked, but will end careers given the breach of trust that screwing with such things represents. So I reckon we can expect to hear more about this, especially if it turns out that EJ’s spend was in fact approved, as that would then potentially be a defamation issue that RA really cannot afford.

The weekend’s 6 Nations matches were notable to me for 3 key reasons; we saw the retirement of George North for Wales after a stellar 121 Tests for 47 tries and 2 BIL tours, and for Ireland we saw Peter O’Mahony bow out after 105 Tests for 5 tries and 1 BIL tour. And Italy finished the tourney with two wins, and had it not been for for a ball falling off a tee against France, potentially three wins straight for the first time ever. As regards the retirees, I don’t think anyone can argue they were magnificent toilers for their countries. No one who saw it will ever forget George North physically carrying Izzy Folau upfield in the 2nd test of the 2013 Lions series. And the number of times O’Mahony has put in a pure warrior effort in any number of jerseys is uncountable. But if you ever get the chance, go watch O’Mahony’s effort in the Champions Cup quarter final of 2022 when Munster played Toulouse. It was just awe inspiring.

And by the way, congratulations Ireland on the Championship. I only wish you had shanked the English along the way.

Club Chat – Tackle Heights: after all “The sky is falling” Chicken Little palaver in the preseason, it was with great interest and a rapidly sun-burning head that I trotted out on the weekend to play the first trial match of the new season under the new tackle-height interpretations. Frankly, from a sample size of 100 minutes of footy, across three refs, it was all much ado about not much. At our club we took the tackle interpretation throughout preseason of ‘hit under the ball’. And generally that approach worked well on the weekend. Yes the refs were a bit over-enthusiastic in abusing the pea early on while they made their point in keeping with HQ directives (fair enough). But all in all it wasn’t that big of a change. At park level 101, you just have to make yourself bend your knees a bit more. And that requires a bit more fitness so fatigue doesn’t tempt you to stand up too much. In which case the road to salvation is to be a bit fitter. And why are you playing rugby again? To be fitter? Interestingly though, the early chat proved correct and there were more offloads due to the lower tackling. Ball carriers were reaching up and over the tackler to offload. So again, you need to be a bit fitter to cope with the faster game. Hmmm, ok.

Cauliflower Club: If you’ve not ever heard of them, The Cauliflower Club is a rugby orientated Aussie charity with a focus on supporting the welfare of the disabled and handicapped by using sport and recreation as a means of enhancing the lives of those less fortunate than us, in particular those suffering sports related injuries, while harnessing the spirit and values of rugby. Mustered by Steve Adamson and co, they are worth their weight in gold and their green jersey is one I want to add to my collection at some stage (should I be invited). Their outing at Maitland over the last weekend saw the Mildfires clash with the C.Club and was, by all reports, HUGE. So give them a visit/like/plug. Give them a donation. Get them involved in your club and corporate gigs. It’s what makes our game different.

Well, that’ll do for this week. Have a great week comrades. With the Welsh collecting their wooden cutlery over the weekend I think our Wobblies can build towards a confidence-restoring test series in mid year to put the RWC behind us and herald in the Joe Schmidt era. And forget Oppenheimer with its unending atomic explosion, I wonder if we’ll see the seventh circle of hell open up and devour us all when the Crusaders lose their fifth straight match this coming weekend?

Run straight, tackle brave and play hard folks. Comment away below.