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Home»Super Rugby»Melbourne Rebels»Hup, two, three, four hundred $thousand GI Blues
Melbourne Rebels

Hup, two, three, four hundred $thousand GI Blues

Roscoe TimsBy Roscoe TimsDecember 23, 201069 Comments
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'A Little Ray of Sunshine'

The case AGAINST Greg Inglis coming over to rugby? That’s easy, and I can prosecute it in just one word: ‘mungo’.

Enough? Convinced? Guilty as charged your worship in the court of public opinion, or was that the Sunshine Magistrate’s Court?

Here we friggin’ go again. Izzy Mark II? Despite it being Christmas I’m not feeling the slightest bit charitable about GI and this pathetic saga.

The big difference between Izzy and GI is the obvious. Izzy is a clean-living young Christian bloke who was keen to play AFL. GI isn’t.

He’s the mungo’s ‘mungo’ whose word is his bond. Just ask the Broncos?

Frantic attempts to airbrush history over the assault of his girlfriend clearly don’t work with me.

He eventually admitted the offence in court and was sentenced to diversion, thereby avoiding a conviction.

He was ordered to pay $3000 to a woman’s health unit and to attend men’s behavioural classes. If you have any doubt that it happened, read this.

This was after a PR spin campaign prior to the hearing that suggested he was trying to stop her ‘self-harming’, or the bruise was caused by a ‘Botox’ treatment. Remember that?

Unfortunately, this pathetic excuse sank without trace in front of the beak.

What’s one thing that Izzy and GI have in common? Neither of them want to play rugby union – GI is on record as saying he doesn’t like the game.

What else was there? Oh yeah, the Melbourne Storm salary cap scandal. $30,000 boats, $20,000 shopping vouchers, $200,000 income above his registered salary and the Sergeant Schultz defence ‘I see nothing!’

If you have the slightest doubt that this in fact happened, read this.

Did he cooperate with the NRL investigation over the salary cap rorts? You bet he friggin’ didn’t. Why was that? Oh, I think I could hazard a guess.

GI’s manager Allan Gainey is one of a number under a cloud over the salary cap rorts and is facing some form of sanction next year.

Now, here's a couple of wide boys!

It appears that signing expensive mungo’s from the NRL hasn’t actually been a great success with a number of them sacked due to behavioural issues.

JO’N has said that they weren’t actively looking at signing any more. I can understand that, although you’d give some of them credit for providing an investment return.

But let’s face it, someone like GI just ain’t going to fit in with the rugby crowd.

Whether you claim elitism or not, and who really cares if you do, that’s just the reality of it.

The guy’s a fantastic rugby league player, no doubt about it. But I don’t want him coming over and soiling our game. Like most of them, he’s a huge behavioural risk.

We all know what’s going on though, don’t we? The manager putting pressure on the NRL by claiming interest in the AFL, Melbourne Rebels, Brisbane Bullets, Perth Glory and Tidbinbilla Tadpoles.

Beefing up with Rusty's Rabbit Pie

There are ‘rumours’ that he’s been going to do a Sonny Bro’. Hasn’t his wife just started a new job in Brisbane? Hasn’t he just shifted house to Sydney?

Do you think he’d survive in France? I doubt it. I’m not sure what his IQ is but he doesn’t seem to me to be the sharpest match in the box. Surely he can’t be as thick as Gorden Tallis, mate?

Would punters flock to the rugby to see GI in action? Yeah, certainly some would. I wonder where he’d play? He’s about as fat as a front rower at the moment but I suppose in the centres.

But enough of that mild speculation, big ‘arold can make as many phone calls as he likes but I’d guarantee you that JO’N wont be signing off on it. He’s been burnt before. And I’ll eat my G&GR stubby coolers if he signs for Super Rugby.

Stick with the game you know and profess to love, GI. We don’t want you in our camp. Go to the Poll below:

QuestionsView Results


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Roscoe Tims (aka @LanceFree): A nasty, opinionated little man whose views are indeed narrow with a capital 'N'. Favourite Sport: mungo bashing. Does he ever have anything positive to say?

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