Welcome back G&GRs to Mad Monday, that day when the rugby is over for the weekend and we pile on with our views and reviews. Our thoughts, emotions, anguish, celebrations and sobbing like a scene from the Crying Game (and, yes, Hossman we are talking about you).
Stacks of rugby this weekend, SRP round 5, Super Rugby Women’s week 3 of 5, and the 6 Nations Final Round with the Froggies being crowned 2025 champions. It really is a great time of the year, and a great time to be a fan of the game they play in heaven. Unless you’re a Waratahs fan 🤣🤣🤣.
So sit down, log on and pour yourself some of life’s elixir ☕ and as Big John McCarthy says: “Are you Ready? Are you Ready? Let’s get it on!”
Super Rugby Pacific Round 5
Hurricanes 20 defeated Highlanders 18
KARL’s Hurricanes have finally gotten themselves another W after what has been a pretty poor start to the 2025 SRP season. This was a cracking game to start off the round with both teams in a position to seal this game out. And to be 100% honest, the Clan will go away from this one pretty disappointed they didn’t take it out when they had the chance. The Canes on the other hand, will be happy with the win, but know they probably got away with one.
KARL’s Canes got off to a good start with Naholo opening the scoring with an early try, but also helping themsleves to a nice slice of 🧀 through winger Ngani Punvai. The Clan responded through Caleb Tangitau and an intercept that saw him bolt almost the length of the field which left the Clan in front at oranges 11-8.
The second stanza commenced with little dynamo Cam Roigard putting the Canes back in front by feeding Sullivan into a gap, and then collecting on offload to cross for the try. Tangitau then hit back for the Clan when he strangely made the decision to kick for himself off a penalty, and it put Faleafaga over for a try.
The games lead swapped many times through out, and it looked like the Canes had positioned themselves well at the 62 minute mark, when Rueben Love crossed for a 5 pointer, giving the Canes a two point lead. With 13 mins left on the clock, Gilbert, for the Clan, had a shot at goal for a penalty from inside of 25 metres, but blew it. (Kicking for goal is a recurrent theme in this round).
Sensing their opportunity slipping away, the Highlanders went hard on the attack, with the Canes defending just as hard. The Canes defence holding up stoutly with only 4 mins left on the clock. The Canes had possession and looked like the would hold out and went for a line out. But a terrible throw was pinged by the referee and handed the possession back to the Clan, and the chance for a drop goal was on.
On attack the Highlanders managed to cut through a small gap with Tanielu Tele’a on the charge and getting his team within range. It had the game poised for a heart in the mouth finish, but Gilbert missed twice, and that was the Clan’s chances blown and the Canes taking the biccies.
ACT Brumbies 38 defeated Fiji Drua 21
This was the reverse fixture of the opening round with time the ACT Brumbies hosting the Fiji Drua in Canberra. And to quote Yowie “The Fijians should do well in the game as they’re quite used to playing in back water towns!” 🤣🤣🤣🤣 But it was an Icky Sticky hat trick that got the puppy killers over the line in a 38-21 point victory. And to be honest the scoreboard does not reflect how close fought this game was.
The first quarter of the game was spent with both sides beating the crap out of each other trying to feel where each others weaknesses could be. Probing, running, defending, phase after phase. But at the 18th minute mark after Charlie Cale bolted through the pack, Icky Sticky was on the receiving end of the ball and powered in for his first.
Not wanting to rest on his previous patch of good work, Icky managed to get quick ball out to Lonergan, who was able to cross for another just four minutes after Icky had scored the first one. The Fijians had had enough of that, and through Elia Canakaivata taking a quick tap off a penalty bolted through for a nice little try, stunning the Brumbies.
With big Nick Frost back and Tom Hooper running riot up front, the Brumbies were looking all set to put on a show at home. Ikitau and Andy Muirhead had them flying, each bagging a try in the first 10 minutes, and by oranges they were sitting pretty at 28-7. All was looking good for the Brumbies as they cruised into the break.
But, as the footy gods like to remind us, it’s never over ‘til it’s over. Cale’s back spasms gave the Drua a crack, and they certainly took it. A couple of quick-fire tries from Motikiai Murray and Tevita Ikanivere had the margin slashed to just seven points, and suddenly, the Brumbies were on the back foot.
But then, out of nowhere, the Sticky one snuck in for his third try, benefiting from another cheeky break by Tom Wright (who’s gone back to his ‘Diamonds and Stones’ form of previous years). That gave the Brumbies a bit of breathing room, but the drama was just getting started.
Five minutes later, the Drua thought they had a try back when Ikanivere dotted down after a rolling maul. The ref awarded it, but then TMO James Leckie piped up, showing a different angle where the ball had clearly been lost in the maul. No try. It was a brutal blow for the Drua.
So, with 12 points to claw back and the clock ticking, the Drua gave it everything they had, but the Brumbies’ defence stood firm, refusing to budge. Just when things looked like they might get worse, Murray got binned for a high shot – which also forced Harrison Goddard off for a HIA. Not ideal. The Brumbies put the icing on the cake in the final minute with Luke Reimer getting his name on the score sheet and sealing the bonus point.
Skipper Allan Alaalatoa was stoked, saying it was a solid effort to keep the pressure up right ‘til the final whistle. Classic Brumbies footy – they never let you off the hook. “I think that was probably the most pleasing part,” the Test prop stated. “I thought that we started really well in the first half, and then Fijian Drua capitalised on our mistakes. We probably got a bit loose there at the start of the second half and they came in with two early tries, but I was really proud of the effort there, and getting that bonus point was massive.”
Crusaders 55 defeated Western Force 33
In a game that had some of the worst tee kicking I’ve ever seen, the Dark Ones managed to dispatch the Force in a 55-33 drubbing. In fact the kicking in this game was so bad I heard that both teams put out an emergency call for their respective goal kickers from their under 15D teams. But both D teams responded that they wouldn’t want to sully their reputations that badly. Man it was bad!
The Dark Saders wingers crossed eight times between them as Macca Springer tied Sean Wainui’s record for most tries ever in a Super Rugby Pacific game. Speedster, and all round good guy 🤮 Sevu Reece (3 meat pies) and Springer (5 meat pies) stuck it to the Twiggy All stars in cracking hot afternoon in Christchurch.
Simon Cron made the tactical decision to rest Nic ‘the Lip’ White, Donno Donaldson, Hamish ‘I wish I was still a Red’ Stewart and Carlo Tizzano, while Dylan Pietsch (knee) and Nick Champion de Crespigny (concussion) were left out injured. By sending a B team, I guess Cron had written off the team’s chances before the game, and was blooding his broader squad. Which until half time with the Twiggy All stars still well in it, looked like a good idea. But then, alas poor Yorrick, the wheels fell off.
The Force were well in the game early, taking the lead three times in the first half thanks to Mac Grealy and Will Harris tries and well taken penalty kicks. Canterbury’s kicker Taha Kemara’s (who only snatched one-of-five) absolute Barry Crocker off the tee also gave the Force every opportunity to stay in the game.
JOC 3.0, replaced Kemara at flyhalf after 50 minutes (personally I would’ve dragged Kemara well before that) and demonstrated that nothing beats experience, and helped the Saders put their foot down, and gas it away from the Force. He was his ever wily self and had a hand in Springer’s third try with a well sold dummy and cut through the defensive line, as well as nailing two difficult sideline conversions as a 20-18 oranges score became a rout.
Force captain Jeremy Williams, who is having a real stand out season and surely will be on Joe Schmidt’s radar, grabbed a try with 12 minutes to play as the Force attempted to eek out a bonus point loss. But that was ruined by a late Will Jordan try.
Coaching staff have to take risks and have to rest their players, especially their Wallabies during the season. But this game really hurt the Force. They were so competitive in the first half and then the wheels just fell off. Coach Cron is going to have to go back and have a really close look at what went wrong.
Waikato Chiefs 32 defeated Auckland Blues 31
Well, how’s that for a bit of Super Rugby madness? The Chiefs have held on by the length of a hair on a bee’s willy, sneaking home 32-31 over the Blues in an absolute ball tearer in Hamilton. In what was a top of the ladder versus bottom of the ladder clash, it certainly didnt feel like it. This is BL’s game of the week, so make sure if you are going to watch any other game than the Reds drubbing the Tarts, this is the one to watch 😉.
The game started with the Chiefs sprinting off the line early, with late call up Daniel Rona bagging the opener. The boys from Waikato built a nice eight-point buffer, but the Blues hit back through AJ Lam, who got the slot for an injured Caleb Clarke. The DMac, as he is prone to do, make something out of nothing off a dropped ball and spun his way over to push the Chiefs’ lead to 15-7.
But the Blues weren’t in the mood to roll over and lose another one. Try scoring machine Mark Tele’a and Corey Evans crossed either side of oranges, flip-flopping the scoreboard and putting them in front by four. But alas then came the Chiefs’ bench. Xavi Taele copped a nice chunk of 🧀 and went to the naughty chair, which gave the opportunity for Tupou Vaa’i to cross the line before Cortez Ratima added another one to extend the lead out to 10 points. Marcel Renata did his best to keep the Blues in it with a nice try at the 65 min mark, and when Ioane scored with less than 5 mins left on the clock, it looked like the Blues may just sneak home.
The Blues appeared to have the game in the bag in the final minutes when Stephen Perofeta put a sweet little cross-field kick dead bang into KARL’s favourite player Rieko Ioane’s hands. However, Xavi Taele, on his debut, was given the potential match winning conversion. It looked nice off the boot… until it smacked into the right upright. Unlucky, Kentucky.
Then, in a finish that had more twists than a Donald Trump press conference, the Blues snagged a penalty with less than a minute to go. Anton Segner steps up, only to not find touch. WTF? Chiefs, clearly feeling generous and continuing on with a trend that has become way out of hand this season for a lot of SRP teams, hoofs it straight back to the Blues, giving them one last crack to snatch victory out of the jaws of defeat. Another cross-field kick, another scramble, and somehow the Chiefs hang on. Top spot secured, but only just.
Queensland Reds 35 defeated NSW Waratahs 15
Well, well, well, the Queensland Reds have given the Waratahs a good old-fashioned paddlin’, running away with a 35-15 win in front of a packed Suncorp crowd. And let’s be honest, it was never really in doubt. Well unless your name is Hoss!
The men in red were firing from the get-go, flying out to a 21-8 lead at halftime while the Tahs tried to keep things respectable. Credit where it’s due, the Waratahs didn’t just roll over—they threw a few punches (some literally) but found themselves outclassed across the park.
This one had a bit of spice, thanks to a couple of former Reds in Taniela Tupou and Lawson Creighton suiting up in blue. Tupou, usually a fan favourite in Brissie, got a mixed reception. Some cheers, some jeers, and probably a few blokes yelling something about how much KFC he consumes.
NSW started with plenty of fire but not a whole lot of discipline, highlighted by Andrew Kellaway getting himself binned early for a textbook example of what not to do in a tackle (more on that later). He absolutely folded Harry Wilson in half, and after a bit of backchat on the way to the naughty chair, Wilson gave as good as he got.
That incident seemed to wake the Reds up, and from there it was all Queensland. Young gun Heremiah Murray pounced for a classic fullback’s try, cancelling out Tristan Reilly’s opener. The Tahs seemed to forget that when your fullback is in the bin, someone needs to cover his defending spot! Then Wilson—nose bloodied but ego intact—powered over for one of his own before the Reds’ forward pack really got rolling. Richie Asiata, in true front-rower fashion, finished off a 20 metre maul that would’ve had Nutta going off his chops. I have no doubt Dan ‘Chuckles’ McKellar wouldn’t have seen the funny side of this one.
By the time Fraser McReight finished off a silky backline move, it was all but done and dusted. Unfortunately, McReight’s night ended early after his shoulder copped a tweak, but not before he left his mark on the contest. NSW had their chances, but every time they sniffed the line, the Reds shut them down. Wilson capped off a blinder by winning a crucial turnover, and big Angus Blyth rumbled over late to well and truly ice the cake. Langi Gleeson grabbed a consolation try, but by then, the Tahs’ goose was well and truly cooked.
Special mentions? Seru Uru looked like he’d never missed a beat in his return, while young Max Jorgensen was about the only Waratah who looked consistently dangerous. Tate McDermott is looking more and more like the Wobs scrum half, and little Tommy Lynagh iced 100% off the boot, looking like the #10 the Wobs need.
End result? Reds march on, and the Waratahs limp back to Sydney wondering how they let yet another one slip north of the border.
Super Rugby Pacific 2025 – Ladder
Well every week the SRP ladder seems to tip itself upside down and change around. The Tahs were the only undefeated team, but now they aren’t! The Saders who started thee season down the bottom are in second place, and there are now three teams from Australia and New Zealand in the top six. God I am loving this season.
Men Six Nations – Final Round
Ireland 22 defeated Italy 17
Ireland Scrape Past Italy in a Scrappy Affair – that was a bit of a dog’s breakfast, wasn’t it? Ireland got the job done, sure, but it wasn’t exactly poetry in motion. In a game that had more ups and downs than a Wallabies World Cup campaign, the reigning champs managed to scrape a 22-17 win over Italy in Rome.
The big story of the match was hooker Dan Sheehan bagging a hat-trick of tries as Ireland walked away with a bonus point win to top the Six Nations table—for now. But if they’re serious about lifting the trophy for a third straight year, they’ll need a bit of help from their mates in Wales and Scotland. That’s right, the men in green are now sitting back and hoping England bottle it in Cardiff and the Scots do a number on France in Paris.
Now, let’s talk about the match itself. On paper, this should have been a straightforward day at the office for Ireland. Instead, they made heavy work of an Italian side that spent 30 minutes with 14 men. That’s right—Italy had three players 🧀 at various points, including a 20-minute 🍷 for Ross Vintcent after a classic “what were you thinking, mate?” head-on-head shot.
Despite all that, Italy were still in the fight till the end. They showed plenty of ticker, scoring through Monty Ioane and Stephen Varney, while Ange Capuozzo reminded everyone why he’s the most exciting thing to happen to Italian rugby since espresso.
Ireland, on the other hand, left plenty of points on the park. Their finishing in the Italy 22 was about as clinical as a DIY home surgery kit, and if not for Sheehan’s rolling maul heroics, this could have been a very different result. Hugo Keenan also crossed for a five-pointer, but Jack Crowley’s radar was well off, missing three conversions that kept things a little too interesting. (He must have been watching the Dark Saders v Twiggy’s Force game from the day before).
The game also marked the end of an era with Peter O’Mahony and Conor Murray calling time on their international careers. Two blokes who’ve bled green for years, and they bow out with a scrappy win that just about summed up Ireland’s campaign under stand-in coach Simon Easterby—good enough, but not exactly setting the world on fire.
So, where does that leave us? Ireland have the five points they needed, but their fate is out of their hands. If England and France both get up, it’s all over. If not, well, a third straight title might just land in their laps. Either way, it wasn’t pretty, but it was just enough. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need a drink after watching that.
England 68 defeated Wales 14
This was an absolute train wreck. Wales caretaker coach Matt Sherratt has described his side’s record-breaking 68-14 shellacking at the hands of England in Cardiff as “devastating”—which might be the understatement of the year.
This loss wasn’t just bad, it was historically awful. Wales have now racked up 17 consecutive defeats, the worst losing streak ever for a Tier One nation in the professional era. It was also their heaviest-ever home defeat and the most points they’ve ever conceded in Cardiff (who said getting rid of Gatland would fix things huh!) England helped themselves to 10 tries—five in each half—like they were at an all-you-can-eat buffet, which some of their piggies looked like they had been.
To make things worse, Wales have now collected back-to-back wooden spoons for the first time in their history. The only people celebrating in Wales right now are tree surgeons, given how much timber they’ve stacked up in the last two Six Nations campaigns.
And to think, there was a bit of optimism floating around after Wales’ respectable 27-18 loss to Ireland in Sherratt’s first game in charge. That hope has now been well and truly torched, and the ashes are probably still smouldering somewhere near the Principality Stadium.
From the outset, this match was a bloodbath. England had five tries on the board by half-time, leading 33-7 at the break. Maro Itoje set the tone in just the third minute, and from there, it was an English stampede. Tom Roebuck, Tommy Freeman, Chandler Cunningham-South, and Will Stuart all got in on the act before oranges.
Things only got uglier in the second half. Alex Mitchell, debutant Henry Pollock (who bagged a brace), Joe Heyes, and Cunningham-South (grabbing his second) all helped themselves to meat pies as England ran riot. Wales, meanwhile, looked like they’d rather be anywhere else.
This wasn’t just a loss, this was a full-scale collapse. Wales are now staring into the abyss, and unless something changes fast, there’s no telling how much deeper they can sink. As for England? Well, they won’t get an easier day at the office.
France 35 defeated Scotland 16
In the end, there were no arguments. England threw the kitchen sink at France, and the Jocks gave it a red-hot crack too, but Les Bleus can play rugby any way they like. They flicked the switch in the third quarter, going from silky smooth to straight-up brutal, putting Scotland to the sword and locking up the title while they were at it.
They bloody well deserve it too. The Stade de France went off like a frog in a sock as their heroes came home after three weeks on the road. That first game in London? That was the one that cost them the Grand Slam they thought they had in the bag. Too many brain explosions that day. But since then they’ve been untouchable, and now they’ve got their first Six Nations title since 2022.
Records? Plenty of them. Louis Bielle-Biarrey bagged his eighth try of the tournament – a new Six Nations record. France also went past England’s 2001 tally of 29 tries to set a new benchmark for team tries. Bravo Zulu.
Scotland played their part. As these two have been the most entertaining sides of the whole tournament. The Haggis Eaters don’t have the muscle of the French, but they can spin it just as well – and for 45 minutes, they had France rattled. That’s when England dared to dream. Old questions about French composure started bubbling up, but they were shut down in brutal fashion.
France went into the sheds ahead, but only just. The rugby gods smiled on them when Scotland thought they’d nabbed their second try on halftime. Blair Kinghorn – the fullback of the tournament – carved them up on the counter before Finn Russell pulled the strings beautifully to send Tom Jordan over. Or so they thought. The TMO had a squiz and spotted Kinghorn’s elbow scraping the touchline. Try gone. France still ahead.
There was more luck for France earlier on. Peato Mauvaka got himself binned for an unnecessary cheap shot on Ben White. Didn’t look like he meant to headbutt him, but his noggin clipped the Jock’s chin, and White went down like he’d been sniped. The bunker had a look, but it stayed yellow – could’ve easily been red, and no one would’ve complained.
France had a game on their hands. They started strong, baiting Jamie Ritchie into a cynical lineout infringement that saw him in the naughty chair early. From there, it was classic France – Thomas Ramos turning it inside to Gaël Fickou, who put Yoram Moefana over for a 10-0 lead.
Russell and Ramos traded penalties before Scotland hit back. Russell found Huw Jones with a cut-out ball, and moments later, the Scottish wizard switched it up to put Darcy Graham through a gap. The little bloke scorched through the defence to score. Moments later, Russell slotted another penalty to level things up. But France had the final say before halftime, with Ramos knocking over another three-pointer to reclaim the lead.
Then came the championship-winning blitz. Scotland looked dangerous straight after the break, but one switch pass too many hit the deck, and Romain Ntamack pounced. Who else but Bielle-Biarrey was on his hip, streaking away for his record-breaking try?
That was the dagger. Then came the sledgehammer. Six of France’s seven bench forwards piled on, and the Scots felt every bit of it. A couple of penalties later, France had a lineout deep in Scottish territory. A big shove, a bit of patience, and then the backs finished the job. Damian Penaud sent it to Ramos, and the fullback not only iced the try but also passed Frédéric Michalak as France’s all-time top point-scorer.
From there, it was academic. Bielle-Biarrey weaved his magic again, setting up Moefana for his second try and France’s fourth. Bonus point locked in. Championship sealed.
Old Man Shouting At Clouds
I must say, this incident ‘ground my gears’ in true Peter Griffin style. Not only does Kellaway cost his team dearly, he then has the temerity after dangerously spear tackling his Wallabies team mate and captain, but then give him a gob full about something like “not being a tough forward if you can’t handle that” or words to the effect of.
Holy crap Bataman! Have you just won idiot of the year award or at least leading contender for it? Maybe apologising to the guy you have just slammed headfirst into the ground. Or going and sitting in the naughty corner and reflecting on the stupid and dangerous thing you have just done, and how much you may have just cost your team in doing so. NOPE! I’m going to walk off the ground like a gob shite mouthing off.
This certainly isn’t what I expected from the Ginger Ninja. Up until this moment he was one of my favourite Wallaby players who seemed like a really mature player and all round nice bloke. But he’s just outed himself as the complete opposite. I hope Joe Schmidt was watching!
Anyway enough of this old man gobbing off. Over to you G&GRs. Have at it.
