Welcome to Friday’s Rugby News rugby lovers and what a jam packed rugby Friday it is. There’s niggle, aggro and conflict all around the rugby cosmos. A team is canned, a union in conflict, former players tossing hand grenades, injuries, form, finals variables and a whole lot more. So grab some happy juice and strap yourself in.
First up we discuss matters on the home front with the Rebel culling in ‘Good Call?’. Ponder possible outcomes in ‘Where To Now?’. Actually discuss some on field action via ‘Is That It?’. Look at the finals ramifications for Oz sides in ‘What’s it all Mean?” Take a gander over the ditch with ‘Shots Fired.’ And savour another ‘Friday’s Goss with Hoss’, guaranteed to take you to your ‘happy place’.
Good Call?
So did RA make the right call? Well yes, but with a caveat.
Firstly, you’d have to be an ignorant turd, or governor of the Reserve Bank, to not empathise with the suffering and plight of the people. The players, coaches, administrators, their loved ones (and anyone I might’ve missed) affected by this decision. They aren’t to blame and are the human casualties of a ruthless, but ultimately correct, business decision.
Sure, there’ll be more to play out over this matter. Legal manoeuverings, claim, counter-claim ad nausea from the sidelines. But, however you cut it, the Rebels are done. There’ll be conspiracy theories. There’ll be many an old axe to grind. And there’ll be tantrums and toys thrown from various cots. There’ll be forensic claim and counter-claim: who knew what when, who said what first, who blinked first, who was funding whom, who was behind what; but, to quote a bush classic, the horse has already bolted, bit late to be closing the gate now.
Indeed, one of the first hand grenades lobbed by the mythical Melbourne ‘consortium’ (who may be ex Lehman Brothers executives, it’s hard to tell), being thus: ‘it is a slap in the face to Victorian sports loving fans’. I’m sorry, come again? It’s a what, for whom?
The very essence, the key contributing factor to all of the Rebs’ financial woes is the very fact that the Rebels have been loved less than a red-haired step child by famed ‘Victorian sports loving fans’ (who apart from ‘here’s a point for trying’ ball, don’t actually attend any other sport) for well over a decade now. So, you see, the same fans who never attended the Rebels, in turn causing a prolonged financial collapse, will now be upset that they don’t have a Rebels team to support any more! Right.
And the solution to rescuing the Rebels from financial and fan failure is to what again? Move them to a suburban outpost in BFI West, with no public transport, a reduced funding amount, a ground that can barely hold the Dandenong Under 8s domino carnival and somehow this is rugby salvation? A blueprint for success, a recipe for greatness?
In all of the talk of missing millions, of debt and funding, of the consortium’s ‘$30m in backing’ now being $18m, of RA’s subsidies, of ATO debts, of administrator findings of trading while insolvent, one much smaller number is actually the most important and far more revealing of the lot: 14.
- For 14 years the Rebels have been funded, failed, funded again and failed again.
- For 14 years the Victorian public have continually failed to support the team
- For 14 years the Victorian business community has continually failed to support the team
For 14 years, good, well-intentioned people on all sides have tried to breathe life into the Michael Schumacher of Australian rugby, but there’s been no response. For 14 years good money has been thrown after bad in attempts to succeed with the Melbourne experiment. Such an experiment deserved funding and effort. But after 14 years, surely enough is enough, and should’ve been enough in 2017 when everybody knows the wrong team was canned.
I said up top I believe RA have made a good call, but with a caveat. Never waste a good crisis. While this is an emotive issue with differing views, the current iteration of RA, sans The Hammer, have shown more discipline and leadership than any of its predecessors. The Rebels axing is bad news for some for sure, but perhaps it’s also good news for the Australian rugby collective. And perhaps an opportunity to drive through a rugby reset for Australia.
I would urge RA to use this opportunity to drive through centralisation. I would use it as an opportunity to expand both the SRP season length and its spread to include Japan (as per my article in Feb this year). I would urge it to look at a second tier comp like the NRC/ARC, that sits above club rugby and below SRP.
Leadership is making tough and unpopular decisions for the good of the business’s future. This is an unpopular decision and only time will tell if it’s the right one. But like it or lump it, RA have shown leadership. It’s what they do from now that will have the history books lauding or loathing them in the future.
Good call? Time will tell, but for mine, it’s the right call for now.
Where to Now?
For all of the above, the rugby player market in Australia is going to get quite interesting. There’ll be a large number of fairly handy union players and some pretty useful coaches about to hit the open market. And it won’t be just Australian vultures sides circling to pick at the corpses. And here’s where you gotta love St Joe’s clarity around Wallaby selections. You wanna play the FUKIRs and take part in a home World Cup? Guess where you have to play your rugby sunshine!
The cynic in me would suggest the Rebels decision was known by RA for quiet some time. No doubt there would’ve been legal and financial formalities and requirements happening behind the scenes that meant the announcement took as long as it did. But….did you notice how St Joe started singing the ‘play for Australia, play in Australia’ hymn some time ago. One might even suggest a certain symbiosis between RA and St Joe on this matter. Perhaps further illustrations that the grown ups are indeed back at RA HQ.
But I digress. What could be better than playing in front of 82 seagulls and 27 people at a Rebels home ground than heading north to the premier state to ply your rugby trade? And in a strange coincidence, there just happen to be a few vacancies at Tah central:
- Head coaching role
- Possible assistant coaching roles (drums are beating both Jason Gilmore and Chris Whitaker could be OS bound)
- A playmaker at #10 (whispers for weeks that Flash was Sydney bound, hence no outpourings of frustrations or sadness with recent Tah player departures))
- One or two props
- A few locks
- A couple of loosies
- An outside back or three (the Ginger Ninja had already signed for the Tahs next year)
Equally, I’m hearing a certain chunky front rower (and KFC Gold Card holder) may want back in at the QPRP Reds now that a bible-thumping former coach has moved on.
Ponder this for a minute. What would the likes of Leota, Canham, Gibbon, Uelese, Tupou, Eloff, Pone, Salakaia-Loto, Mafi, Smith, Wilkin, Kemeny, Talakai or Lancaster do for the team you follow? I know what it would do for Oz rugby in general and the pressure it puts on all to get better if you want to retain your spot, or likewise, force your way into a side.
If nothing else, the player market is going to make fascinating viewing. Pass me the popcorn please.
Is that it?
A phrase I’ve heard more than I’d like to. Just as Super Rugby is getting interesting, the preliminary rounds are near done and it’s finals time already. But before then, there are one or two permutations still to play out, including the looming shadow of a certain 7 time consecutive SRP winner looming large over the contenders. With the Crusaders a real chance of sneaking into the eight (cue spooky music here). Wouldn’t that put the randy, drunken Kiwi shearer among the livestock?
Friday 31 May 5:05 PM AEST – Crusaders v Moana Pasifika at Apollo Projects Stadium, Christchurch
At home and with it all to play for, I’m going to go all out and say this is a five point certainty for the Saders. But what do they need to happen elsewhere though? As first match of the weekend they simply must win, bank the five points and finish on 24 points on the ladder.
Fearless Prediction: Crusaders by 30.
Referee: Angus Gardner Assistant Referees: Matt Kellahan, Jeremy Markey
Friday 31 May 7:35 PM AEST – NSW Waratahs v Queensland Reds at Allianz Stadium, Sydney
Good to see the Albatross (Tom Ross) back from injury in the starting XV and alongside none other than 72 year old Paddy Ryan. Ryan is back after playing for the Combined Baptist Retirement XV, known around the circuit as the ‘Colostomy Crusaders’ and his experience, before his half time nap, will be much needed.
The Reds, meh, they’re OK, but only just. Got a few fair to middling prospects in their side and might go all right. Besides win, lose or draw, the Commies are guaranteed to finish in 5th spot on the ladder. So, could there be an element of taking it easy, not wanting to get hurt, of throttling back?
Fearless Prediction: Yes, there will. Tom Ross to score winning try. Tahs by 4.
Referee: James Doleman Assistant Referees: Jono Bredin, Fraser Hannon
Saturday 1 June 12:05 PM AEST – Fijian Drua v Melbourne Rebels at Churchill Park, Lautoka
Won’t this be a match sprinkled with the spice of anger. Add in a pinch of payback thrown in for good measure. Then simmer for 80 minutes.
STAN’s Between 2 Posts show said earlier this week that social media is abuzz in Fiji with the Drua looking to square up with the Rebels for what was a spiteful first encounter in Melbourne earlier in the year. You might recall the Drua copped two deserved red cards for a deliberate strike from Frank Lomani and a headbutt from reserve hooker Brainsnapamani. Throw in an angry Drua lying in wait for a pissed off Rebels following their axing and you have a powder keg sitting inside a fireworks factory that shares a wall with an oxy acetylene plant, all next to a gas works. This could get rather fiery and very quickly.
If life has taught me anything (and to be clear, it hasn’t) it’s that emotion or inflamed passion is not a sustainable fuel. It burns bright, it burns vigorously but it burns out after nearly two minutes and so you get dressed and watch Seinfeld replays and block out the heckling from the bedroom. The team that can rise above itself, park the emotions, execute the game plan and stay on mission will be the team that wins this.
An interesting side note: a Rebels victory could also (likely) catapult the Crusaders into the eight!
Fearless Prediction: The team to compartmentalise the friction the best? The Rebels. The Drua have already shown when their dander is up rugby is a distant afterthought. Rebs by 9.
Referee: Paul Williams Assistant Referees: Dan Waenga, Mike Winter
Saturday 1 June 2:35 PM AEST – Hurricanes v Highlanders at SKY Stadium, Wellington
Highlanders are guaranteed a finals spot and the Canes win puts them with a chance of taking #1 spot for the season.
Fearless Prediction: Canes by 6. Bonus points to prove critical.
Referee: Nic Berry Assistant Referees: Reuben Keane, George Myers
Saturday 1 June 5:05 PM AEST – Blues v Chiefs at Eden Park, Auckland
Ding dong battle of the titans. Like the Canes, the Blues are playing for the minor premiership. The Chuffs might make 4th place, but can’t finish lower than 5th. Who’s got the most to gain you reckon? As good as the Canes have been this year, it’s the Blues that to me are the best all round team in the comp.
Fearless prediction: Blues by 11 and the minor premiership.
Referee: Ben O’Keeffe Assistant Referees: Stu Curran, Jackson Henshaw
Saturday 1 June 7:35 PM AEST – Western Force v ACT Brumbies at HBF Park, Perth
Last game, both will know their fate and both could be masters of their own domain. Force desperate for a finals appearance. The Brumbies are a win and one favourable result away from a possible home semi-final. Cinderella story for the Force, or the brutality of the Brumbies?
Fearless prediction: Brutality shatters glass footwear. Brumbies by 20.
Referee: Jordan Way Assistant Referees: Damon Murphy, Jordan Kaminski
What’s it all mean?
How Aussie sides fare (from rugby.com.au and AAP)
Brumbies
Current ladder position: 3rd
Final round: AWAY v Western Force, Saturday 7.35pm AEST
Best possible finish: 1st
Worst possible finish: 3rd
Can snatch the minor premiership with a win and last-round losses for the Blues and Hurricanes, or at least an all-important top-two finish with victory and one loss from their two New Zealand rivals.
Queensland Reds
Current ladder position: 5th
Final round: AWAY v NSW Waratahs, Friday, 7.35pm AEST
Best possible finish: 5th
Worst possible finish: 5th
Certain to finish fifth but will fancy their chances of repeating their hoodoo-busting win in New Zealand last year over the Chiefs in a guaranteed quarter-final in Hamilton.
Melbourne Rebels
Current ladder position: 7th
Final round: AWAY v Fijian Drua, Saturday, 1205pm AEST
Best possible finish: 6th
Worst possible finish: 8th
In a fairytale turned nightmare, the Rebels head to Lautoka with their future fate doomed despite qualifying for the finals for the first time in the club’s 14-year history.
Western Force
Current ladder position: 9th
Final round: HOME v ACT Brumbies, Saturday 735pm AEST
Best possible finish: 8th
Worst possible finish: 10th
Facing a simple scenario of needing to beat the Brumbies and praying the Fijian Drua slip up at home against the Rebels to scrape into the playoffs.
Shots Fired
Despite the players huffing and puffing about their preferred position with a new governance model around Rugby in NZ, the establishment have given them a big ‘up yours’ to their wishes.
Short story is that is that a group consisting of NZ Rugby, the NZ Māori Rugby Board, the Super Rugby teams, some provinces and the players’ association was asking to implement the findings of last year’s Pilkington Report as discussed on stuff.co.nz In a secret ballot, those supporting the implementation of the report lost the vote 59-31.
Just what this means for the game in NZ is unclear, but stuff.co.nz further reports that it won’t be pretty. If I were the players’ association I’d refuse to play a test until next year, or send reserve NPC players to contest the Bledisloe Cup. #westandwithyousowecanwintheBled
Friday’s Goss with Hoss
Serenity Now.
Zen master and NFL tricks Instagrammer Quade ‘I’ve been everywhere man’ Cooper, has opened up on the disrespect Eddie Jones showed when he omitted Quade Cooper-san from the RWC, telling planetrugby.com: ‘One does reflect when sipping one’s herbal tea on the journeys and pitfalls of one’s professional rugby journey. Indeed, while recently levitating during one killer Zen session and back flick quarterback passing, one found oneself rather annoyed at that lying little prick for not telling one earlier that one had been rissolled by the other one and therefore one would not be on a plane to the home of oneness. But one moves on’.
Another one bites the dust.
Fellow soothsayer and possibly greatest ever Australian #7, one Michael Hooper, tells the SMH that time and circumstance are against his push for a spot in the men’s Sevens side for the Paris Olympics. Not picked for Madrid due to an osteitis pubis event (which I believe means his voice is deeper and he has grown a few feathers on the nest around ‘little Hoops’).
As ever, the quintessential team man says: “I’ve run the last three days. Truth be told, I need to lift the intensity. I’m not knocking it out of the park when it comes to how it’s going on the field. I need to bridge a bit of a gap in order to make this team. The team is pretty settled and going well. I’ve just got to get on the field. We’re running out of time for that. I’m not braining it at the moment. I’ve got to bridge that gap. If it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen.“
Slippers Out.
Both a sign at my local mosque and breaking news that warhorse Jimmy Slips has succumbed to advanced old age a calf injury and will not only miss the meaningless training run against the Force this week, but likely the QF as well. Indeed Senor Bernie says Slips was an outside chance for a home QF and more likely to be back for the SF on 8 June (if they make it, I added that bit in).
A Club of Three.
And no, it’s not the Alan Jones appreciation club but the number of players who have played for both the goodness (us) and then the darkness, or vice versa, at test level. SMH journo with the lexdysic name, Iain Payten, had some fluff bit about Commie prop, Alex Hodgman, a near certainty for St Joe’s first squad. I reckon I’m more chance of winning Miss Congeniality at the upcoming Scone rodeo than Hodgman wearing orange, but it would be an exclusive club to be in. Hodgman that is, not me, I’m more of a Miss Demeanour contender anyway.
Head Coach?
When is a head coach not a head coach? Why, when he’s a ‘senior coach’, you daft prats, that’s when. Rassie Erasmus hand puppet, Jacques Nienaber explains on planetrugby.com
At least Rassie wins when he cheats.
Is Don. Is Good.
Just a reminder, you can get your weekend rugby fix right here with G&GR’s Don Sully back again tomorrow with The Weekend Edition.
That’s all from me for another week. For one last time this year, go the Tahs.
Hoss -out.
