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Home»Rugby»Friday’s Rugby Bombshell – 11/8/23
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Friday’s Rugby Bombshell – 11/8/23

The Masked AvengerBy The Masked AvengerAugust 10, 2023No Comments
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I didn’t see that coming.

Wallabies coach Eddie Jones has announced his 33 man squad for the 2023 Rugby World Cup tournament:

Props: Angus Bell (23 Tests), Pone Fa’amausili (5), Zane Nonggorr (2), Blake Schoupp (0), James Slipper (131), Taniela Tupou (48)

Hookers: Matt Faessler (1), David Porecki (14), Jordan Uelese (18)

Locks: Richie Arnold (4), Nick Frost (12), Matt Philip (28), Will Skelton (c) (28)

Back Row: Langi Gleeson (3), Tom Hooper (3), Rob Leota (16), Fraser McReight (12), Rob Valetini (34)

Halfbacks: Issak Fines-Leleiwasa (0), Tate McDermott (vc) (25), Nic White (63)

Five-eighth: Carter Gordon (4)

Centres: Lalakai Foketi (5), Samu Kerevi (45), Izaia Perese (5), Jordan Petaia (27)

Outside Backs: Max Jorgensen (0), Andrew Kellaway (23 ), Marika Koroibete (55), Mark Nawaqanitawase (6), Suliasi Vunivalu (2)

Utilities: Ben Donaldson (2), Josh Kemeny (1)


I keep thinking about the Wallabies’ 2011 Rugby World Cup campaign. Remember that? A naive and foolish imported coach selected just one openside flanker in his squad – David Pocock – and there was no way to replace him when he went down injured. The same coach picked Quade Cooper to start at five-eighth for most tests, but forced a hopeless attack plan (maximum three phases in the forwards, then go wide, nothing like the Reds’ Super-winning tactics) on him. 

I’m on the record as calling Quade the most talented Australian player of the last 20 years and I believe the waste of his potential under a string of coaches was a big part of our decline as an international rugby power. (Some might say the same thing about Pocock, and I wouldn’t argue. We just don’t have enough players of that calibre that we can afford to squander them.)

Over recent times, I really thought I knew what was going on in the playmaker department. I had a whole theory about why Dave Rennie had tried Noah Lolesio and James O’Connor and cast them aside; about why Bernard Foley, Carter Gordon and Ben Donaldson were in the frame this year, with Quade. I was going to write an article about it. I’m glad I didn’t.

Coming into the mid-year internationals, I hoped and expected that Eddie Jones (a coach who has engineered some spectacular backline magic over the years) would build his new attack on Quade’s vision, nous and beautiful passing game. When that didn’t eventuate in The Rugby Championship, I smugly thought that Jones must be keeping his plans for the backs under wraps until September. I had planned to write an article about that, too. I’m glad I didn’t.

Because here we are now. There is no secret masterplan, no bold fluid alignments, no total reinvention of backline play, no set-move magic in the works. There’s no Quade. There’s not even a Foley in the squad, or a Reece Hodge. Just Gordon and Donaldson; potential for sure, but no experience to speak of. It’s a situation no happier than 2011.

A few weeks ago, previewing the match against Argentina and trying to explain the exclusion of Pete Samu from the 23, I judged he had played so well as a replacement against South Africa that Jones was tucking him out of harm’s way for the rest of The Rugby Championship, just to make sure he’d be fit and rested for France. 

But I wasn’t certain, and I wrote “Who knows what’s happening inside Eddie Jones’s pointy little head? Maybe he really doesn’t rate Pete Samu all that highly; maybe Pete won’t be going to France. If he’s not in Jones’s final 33 I’m giving up. Call me on the eve of RWC2027, when Phil Waugh sacks Jones and hires, um, Ian Foster.”

No Quade, no Pete. 

So am I giving up? No, I’m not going to stop supporting the Wallabies, but I’ve lost all confidence that Jones is doing anything more than trying out a few mad ideas to see if any of them get traction. He’s not making a serious effort to give us the best possible RWC2023 campaign. 

That’s enough about who’s not in the squad. Let’s look at who’s in. In the list above, I included the caps count for each player to highlight how many have five or fewer. This is remarkable in a World Cup squad. 

Five of the six props are the survivors of a hard TRC campaign. I have a soft spot for Pone Fa’amausili (unlike Charlie Mackay, who just thinks he’s soft) and I hope he has a good trip. Injuries among these guys are inevitable. Blake Schoupp, who was flown to South Africa when James Slipper stumbled in training, is the lucky winner of the spare ticket. I don’t mean ‘lucky’ in a bitchy way; luck is how a lot of players break into the top ranks. I hope this opportunity works out well for Blake and for Wallabies fans.

Similarly, the hookers are TRC survivors. Dave Porecki is the one with form and game time. Starting with Michael Cheika, coaches have seen something in Jordan Uelese that fans haven’t. Jordan, if you’re ever going to deliver, do it in France. 

It looks like Jones picked his favourite locks long ago. They all worked hard in TRC. Matt Philip has taken the long road to consolidate himself as a Wallaby, so good on him. I have nothing to say about Will Skelton’s selection as captain. 

Rob Valetini and Tom Hooper were back row must-picks after TRC and Fraser McReight is the obvious successor to Michael Hooper. Jones is using his prerogative to take Langi Gleeson and Rob Leota after giving them little or no game time in TRC. This is the thing that’s hard to comprehend: Samu and Jed Holloway were given game time and then excluded, presumably because they didn’t show what Jones wanted to see, while players who didn’t demonstrate form and fitness because they weren’t even tested against top opponents have been waved through to the plane. If they’re good enough for RWC, why weren’t they good enough for TRC?

The two incumbent halfbacks are in the squad, with an apprentice coming along to carry their hair and moustache products. That seems right. 

I absolutely do think that Carter Gordon should go to France, no doubt about it. But as the only nominated five-eighth? It’s crazy. I’ll allow that Ben Donaldson is the backup, but think about what that means: Gordon will start every match and Donaldson will be on every bench. If one of them gets a dislocated finger, a tweaked knee or a head knock, it’s going to be calamitous. Two is one and one is none, as they say in the U.S. military. Always pack spares. 

The four centres might be the best we can do, lacking Len Ikitau. I can easily imagine  two of them getting damaged in the warm-up game and the pool matches, but that’s why we have four. 

Out the back, Andrew Kellaway, Marika Koroibete and Mark Nawaqanitawase were must-picks. The other two are Eddie touring specials and I hope they never make a 23. 

I don’t know why we nominate utilities when we can pick three or more of every specialist, and I confess to not knowing much about Josh Kemeny. But it staggers me that these two guys get tickets to France and proven, experienced performers get brushed. I might be Reece Hodge’s last fan but he can cover five-eighth to fullback and has done so in dozens of tests against every nation we’ve played. Pete Samu can do the whole back row.

What did Pete do wrong, Eddie? Did he short-sheet your bed or leave your suitcase off the airport shuttle bus? 

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