Wow and what a Monday G&GRs. More importantly, what a weekend, a weekend where to quote Big Darryl Eastlake from Wide World of Sports, “By Gees, by jingo, by crikey, we have rugby coming out of our arseholes!”.
So get yourself a large cup of ☕, pretend you’re logged on and doing work, and let’s dissect what was a wonderful way to welcome rugby back into our lives. To succumb to that addiction that we all have, where everything else in life goes on hold while we get our fix. So let’s get it on!
As always this is a fan-run site and any contribution is welcome, feel free to reach out to me at bris@greenandgoldrugby.com.au be it with an article an idea, or an opinion piece. There’s also a ‘Submit a Story’ option. So feel free to have a crack as the more the merrier.
Super Rugby Pacific Round One
Chiefs 33 defeated Crusaders 29
In a game that saw both sides suffer several casualties, this game was a humdinger to open the Super Rugby Pacific 2024 season. IMHO the tempo in this game was blisteringly fast and made the other games in this round look a little slow. The Crusaders got off to their typically slow start, with the Chiefs seeming to have not skipped a beat from last year.
The ‘Dark Saders’ appear to be missing Mo’unga, with the new 5/8th Rivez Reihana seeming to struggle to find rhythm in the first half. The Chiefs start was intense, hard-fought, but sometimes patchy. The Saders came back hard in the second half outscoring the Chiefs 19-6, with the talismanic captain, Scott Barrett, barging over the line for a great try. The Chiefs dug in hard and fought to the end for a solid and well-deserved victory. In what I’m calling the game of the round, this is well worth the full watch.
Brumbies 30 defeated Rebels 3
The story of this game isn’t told by the scoreline. While it looks like the Brumbies were dominant, which they were to a large degree, it doesn’t say what appears to be the competitiveness of the Rebels. A real juxtaposition. One thing’s for sure, Corey Toole proved yet again that there’s ‘no substitute for pure speed.
The Rebels real struggle came from numerous blown chances and the fact that they entered the Ponies 22 thirteen times for a grand total of zero points. Lolo won the battle of the 10s over Carter Gordon, who had a bit of a Barry Crocker, with a clear sign that Nic ‘The Lip’ White’s exit from Canberra may just be the best thing for Noah’s career. The Brumbies were not brilliant by any stretch of the imagination, but you can see the formation of a solid crew, with a refined game plan that sticks to the Brumbies’ DNA but has evolved. Hopefully, this will become more evident in the remaining rounds. The Rebels, on the other hand, have to dig deep, put the off-field struggles behind them, and concentrate on their skills and their game plan.
Hurricanes 44 defeated Western Force 14
The Western Force haven’t started their season the way they would’ve liked, with Harry Potter copping some Hogwarts cheddar in the first four minutes of the game, thinking he was playing quidditch, taking out Ruben Love in the air. This indiscretion cost the Force dearly, with the Canes banging down two majors while being a man up. In a game played in stinking hot weather that you would’ve assumed would benefit the home side, combined with a bloody long flight from Wellington to Perth, it was the sheep lovers who were keen to take advantage of the quick ball conditions and play fast.
The Force managed to muster a bit of a comeback in the second half with Nic ‘The Lip’ White and Chase Teatia, managing to cross the line. But it wasn’t enough to drag back that two-try deficit gained in the first half due to the sin bin. Simon Cron will have to go back to the drawing board and see if he can re-gig the game plan to get the Force firing.
Blues 34 defeated Fiji Drua 10
In a game that saw almost as much cheddar as the Margaret River Cheese Factory, the Blues managed to cruise to a relatively easy victory over the Fijians. The Blues set the match up for the choccies in a very solid first 40, with the breeze favouring them on what was a very warm day in Whangarei on the North Island. The Auckland-based franchise dotted down five tries to carve out a 29-3 lead at oranges.
The Drua managed to get the rhythm flowing in the second half, with the Blues’ Christie sitting in the naughty chair reflecting on his team’s indiscretions that he wore the card for, Fiji started to pull themselves back into the game. But the Blues demonstrated by keeping it real tight, and reducing the amount of free play ball the Fijians can get their hands on, they start to struggle. Teams without this ability will find the Drua a real handful this year.
Highlanders 35 defeated Moana Pasifika 21
The Otago Highlanders started the 2024 SRP season with a hard-fought 35-21 victory over Moana Pasifika on Saturday evening in Dunedin. The Clan forged ahead with two solid tries, but MP returned fire to take an 18-14 lead at oranges.
The Clan came out firing in the second half managing to bang down three tries in reasonably quick succession to take the wind out of MP’s sails. In what was a pretty close match, the Pasifika Islanders will take a lot of positives out of this game, with it evident that they have built on last year’s experience.
Qld Reds 40 defeated Waratahs 22
In the battle of the Super Powers of Australian Rugby, it was the new kid on the block Les Kiss that got his second notch up on the hapless Waratahs. It was a warm and muggy evening at that fortress of Australian and Queensland rugby, Suncorp stadium with 14,593 in attendance. The conditions looked like both teams were going to play it tight, but alas both teams wanted to play it fast and loose in an attacking game. The only problem is, one team turned up with a 44 Magnum, and the other with a .177 lightweight air rifle.
The Tahs were first to get some points on the board, but rest assured, Hunter Pisami, hadn’t had enough of smacking the Tahs around at their last trial game in Roma, so he picked up where he left off and threw some serious smackdown.
The Sydneysiders got their first 5 pointer from an intercept pass where Marky Mark and his Funky Bunch picked up a pass from Joe Dirt, bolted down, and offloaded to Jake Gordon, who celebrated like he had won the game just by scoring. The Reds remained calm, and even after being denied a try to Fraser McReight by the TMO’s call, stayed focused and continued the attack.
The Tahs were the beneficiaries of another TMO call on a pass that was so forward it almost time travelled. But, hey, RA now owns the Tahs, so they have to get some assistance. However, the biggest call of the TMO came a few moments later when Max Jorgensen was pinged for taking out Jordan Petaia without the ball, with the Reds getting a penalty try and Max getting some time in the naughty corner to reflect on the timing of his tackles. There’ll be plenty written about this one, most coming from south of Tweed. But the Kiwi referee sitting with us (KARL), who doesn’t have a dog in the fight said, “That’s fair enough!”.
Waratahs New Flyhalf – Tane ‘Sloth’ Edmed.
The Reds took a 21-15 lead to oranges and started the second half the way they left off, applying pressure and turning down three points to go for gold and the try line. That try came through Matty Faessler, with his second try of the game through another well-executed rolling maul. The Tahs struggled with their discipline in trying to counter these mauls, earning the Reds repeated attempts through penalties.
The Reds powered home and Fijian import Seru Uru proved something that I always knew, that most locks should be able to kick, and his great kick caught the Tahs napping and got the Reddies down to the 5m metre line, and a scrum, where Dirty Harry Wilson re-visited primary school, played some great tunnel ball, out to Joe Dirt who dived over in the corner.
The NSWelshmen will whinge about the card, but it was their inability to attack and lack of discipline that cost them the game. Not the TMO! Darren Coleman has now lost the only game that was probably winnable in the first four he has to succeed in to keep his contract. This looks like a shocking season for the Tahs. The Reds are looking solid, and if they can manage to erase some stupid mistakes and skill errors, they could have a great season on their hands.
Not only was this Reds win great, but having the pleasure of hosting some of the G&GR writers to Suncorp made it even better as the big Hossman spent most of the night crying into his bourbon and cokes. But jokes aside, great to see the G&GR team up in God’s country for the start of the season.
Six Nations Round 3
Scotland 30 Defeated England 21
Well, the Haggis Eaters have secured the Calcutta Cup for the fourth year in a row. According to Happyman, this is the first time the Scots have done this since the invention of the radio circa 1920, so Keith was probably in high school then and listening to it on the wireless.
This victory was a solid pummelling, putting the Soap Dodgers to the sword in an empiric fashion. Conducted by Finn Russell and delivered by an absolutely stunning hat-trick from Duhan van der Merwe. DVDM was electric throughout the game tearing England’s defences apart. England though, did get off to a good start in the game, having pushed the Scots onto their back foot from the outset, and managing to take the lead in the 5th minute. And with a George Ford penalty managed to stretch that to 10-0 in the 15th minute.
The Scots spent the first quarter of the game in a bit of shambles, approaching the 20-minute mark, they managed to pull their finger out of their bot bot, and start playing rugby. This managed to affect the confidence of the soap-averse, and their game and skills started falling apart with it. England, having played bugger-all rugby since the opening quarter, gave themselves a chance to re-enter the game in the 67th minute when replacement wing Feyi-Waboso dotted one over the line on the left-hand side. Fin Smith hit the post with the conversion, leaving the Scots nine points ahead and able to control the remainder of the game comfortably and cruise to victory.
What was the only disappointing thing for DVDM, was copping a serve of cheddar in the last few minutes of the game. The referee awarded it a penalty, but the TMO check checked and he was sent off. Personally, for me, it was a penalty at best. Scotland appears to have their camp now in order and seem to be operating effectively as a unit. The Poms on the other hand look like a total shambles and will need to do some serious analysis to work out what the hell they can do to try and resurrect their 6 nations campaign.
Ireland 31 Defeated Wales 7
The Oirish have continued to demonstrate that they are the pack leaders in the Northern Hemisphere, and that by a considerable margin. Their performance against the Welsh looked like they barely got out of first gear, put this young and rebuilding Welsh team to the sword.
Wales’ first-half discipline was poor, in fact very poor. With many of their promising attacks blown completely out of their backsides by their unforced errors. This wasn’t helped by the Emerald Isles’s amazing defence, which held pretty rock solid throughout the game. Not to say that the Irish didn’t have their own discipline problems. There were plenty of errors and giving away penalties in the first half, it is just they managed to defend their way out of them.
The Irish seem to be doing the 6 Nations at a canter this year, with France looming as the only team that might be up to the challenge. But they are having their issues too.
France v Italy
This game hadn’t been played at the time of the drafting of this article so I will leave it for the Tuesday Crew.
Well, that should about do it for today. I hope everyone’s Monday isn’t too bad. And there’s plenty of rugby to chat about for the rest of the week, getting us ready for round two.
Over to you G&GRs. Have At it!
