Twas the night before Choke-mas, when all through the land
All Black supporters were nervous, as Dan wasn’t the man
The Black jerseys were hung in the change rooms with care
In the hope that the World Cup, soon would be theirs.
The Children lay sleepless, cowering in their beds
While visions of Morty03 danced through their heads
They’d heard all the stories of yesteryear’s disgrace
Deep down they knew, the same scenario they’d face
How quickly things changed, two weeks for the switch
It was down to the business end, and they’d developed quite a twitch
Split Enz were singing history couldn’t possibly repeat
But now it seemed a mere formality, due to Richie’s swollen feet
DC and Slade had cried off injured and unable to stand the pain
So the AB’s called up The Don, who hadn’t even trained
The other replacement was Cruden, a skateboarder of renown
It was clear after these two picks, that the AB’s were going down
You see The Don was no stranger to totally fucking up
He’s hardly the sort of bloke you’d want, if trying to win a Cup
There were countless times The Don had let in the opposition
It was said by many folk, creating balls-ups was his disposition
When the squad was first picked, The Don didn’t make the cut
He left for Waiuku River, and his favorite fishing hut
The Don had left it all behind, his final chance to be great
But he’d found his niche on the banks of Waiuku, casting for whitebait
As the final whistle drew nearer, and injuries took their toll
With ten long minutes left, on the field The Don did stroll
The Wallabies were down by six and looking well past jaded
But it was the All Blacks who knew then that their finals hopes had faded
The Don he ran wide, but zigged instead of zagged
The Wobblies took seven, the AB’s dreams were shagged
Smug Ted and his cohorts didn’t survive the aftermath
But the Don rode again as he pissed off to Bath!
All around the countryside the signs said ‘Bring Back Buck’
But have now been replaced with ‘The Don is a useless fuck’
