All Blacks

‘Twas the Night Before Choke-mas

‘Twas the Night Before Choke-mas

Twas the night before Choke-mas, when all through the land

All Black supporters were nervous, as Dan wasn’t the man

The Black jerseys were hung in the change rooms with care

In the hope that the World Cup, soon would be theirs.


The Children lay sleepless, cowering in their beds

While visions of Morty03 danced through their heads

They’d heard all the stories of yesteryear’s disgrace

Deep down they knew, the same scenario they’d face


How quickly things changed, two weeks for the switch

It was down to the business end, and they’d developed quite a twitch

Split Enz were singing history couldn’t possibly repeat

But now it seemed a mere formality, due to Richie’s swollen feet


DC and Slade had cried off injured  and unable to stand the pain

So the AB’s called up The Don, who hadn’t even trained

The other replacement was Cruden, a skateboarder of renown

It was clear after these two picks, that the AB’s were going down


You see The Don was no stranger to totally fucking up

He’s hardly the sort of bloke you’d want, if trying to win a Cup

There were countless times The Don had let in the opposition

It was said by many folk, creating balls-ups was his disposition


When the squad was first picked, The Don didn’t make the cut

He left for Waiuku River, and his favorite fishing hut

The Don had left it all behind, his final chance to be great

But he’d found his niche on the banks of Waiuku, casting for whitebait


As the final whistle drew nearer, and injuries took their toll

With ten long minutes left, on the field The Don did stroll

The Wallabies were down by six and looking well past jaded

But it was the All Blacks who knew then that their finals hopes had faded


The Don he ran wide, but zigged instead of zagged

The Wobblies took seven, the AB’s dreams were shagged

Smug Ted and his cohorts didn’t survive the aftermath

But the Don rode again as he pissed off to Bath!


All around the countryside the signs said ‘Bring Back Buck’

But have now been replaced with ‘The Don is a useless fuck’


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