There’s so much rugby and not enough time for the usual niceties, so sit down, shut up and let’s go.
Today’s Friday’s Rugby News is bulging at the seams and likely to go viral. First up, let’s praise the rugby gods for all they’ve given in ‘How Good is Rugby, Ay!’. Have a look at the laws of unintended consequences in ‘Space Invaders’. Look into SRP round #4 via ‘Stairway to Rugby Heaven’. Welcome the kickoff of SRW with ‘And We’re back!’. Grow bored and jaded with me in ‘Hey Hakarena’. Then gorge yourself senseless with this ‘Friday’s Goss with Hoss’, where real men cast a shadow, maybe an eclipse, either or.
How Good is Rugby, Ay!
When is too much rugby not enough? Why, when the quality and entertainment value is the best it’s been in a decade.
From STAN’s outstanding wall-to-wall weeknight coverage (just on that, Big Sean, more promotion of our MARGA hat please. It won’t wear itself!), to the quality, pace and breadth of ambition on display in the 6N, to the new laws, upsets and closeness of play in SRP, what’s not to like about rugby at the moment!
Maybe it’s just as simple as the Crusaders finally losing (and consistently at that) and loosening their vice-like grip on Super Rugby. I’ve banged on for years how Kiwis were killing Super Rugby. Maybe it’s the new coaches across the competition. Maybe it’s less nit-picking of referees and the near silence from TMOs (isn’t that bloody refreshing). Whatever it is, long may it last because the 6N and SRP to date has been completely absorbing. And we welcome SRW back this weekend as well.
Too much rugby? No such bloody thing, especially when it’s this good, ay.
Space Invaders.
One of the contributors to such high quality of rugby has been the abolition of the so-called ‘Dupont’s Law’. Such abolition has lead to more skilful kicking: if you put in an average kick and chase you’ll get burnt by the receiving side. The change has also, in my opinion, seen two very positive unintended consequences enter the game, or have greater impact anyway, particularly the creation of space for teams to attack.
Regular readers will know Fridays aren’t traditionally fact reliant, well that and I couldn’t really give a tinker’s cuss looking them up, but there are a few key standouts for mine in SRP this season due to the change:
More linebreaks as teams now seem to squeeze sides defensively to force a rushed, or poorly executed relieving kick. Now this of course has its own risk reward for a defensive side. Get it wrong and all SRP sides have shown a propensity to have a crack from their own 22 and scorch down field for a try But get it right and you either have a significant territorial gain, or a kick that doesn’t find touch and off you go.
In the instance of the ball still being live the abolition of Dupont’s Law has lead to the onus on the kicking side to be put back onside by one of their own players, as opposed to the attacking side perversely playing the offending defenders back onside by running 5m. We had a law where a player, 40 odd metres offside, was played onside by an attacking player running 5m! Talk about the tail wagging the dog.
Now here, in my opinion, is where it really gets interesting. There are fewer defenders in the front line as either the kicker (usually a #9 or #10) runs through and puts their team onside, generating the need for someone to drop back as cover for them. Or you have one of the hair styling, goat milk latte- sipping pretty boys out wide chase through, again generating space to be attacked on the counter, and counter attacks have come aplenty.
The other unintended consequence seems to be the reintroduction of fatigue into the match and fatigue is now a genuine game changer. Poor kicking hands the attacking team many options, so a strong kick chase is vital. Kick chase is predominantly the domain of the higher numbered jerseys, but with all that sprinting through, or sprinting back to cover, there’s more juice being burned than a Friday night at Yowie’s. And it’s no coincidence that there’ve been some terrific short side tries so far in SRP as a result of a player out of position (chasing the kick). Or a player covering the position who maybe not used to defending in that channel. Or simply that a player is gassed from chasing the pill like a demented kelpie all night.
When you sit down tonight to enjoy a game or three, just make a mental note of some of the metres covered by players and the space that created and invaded by this simple, but highly effective law change.
Bravo.
Stairway to Rugby Heaven.
Super Rugby Pacific round 4 is upon us with a few more cracking encounters await. All team news on Happy’s Thursday News.
Friday 15 March 5:05 pm AEDT – Crusaders v Hurricanes at Apollo Projects Stadium, Christchurch on Stan Sport
What’s bad for the Saders, turns out is great for SRP. They can’t take a Cantabrian trick at the moment. News that skipper and red card magnet Scott Barrett is out for six weeks with a broken finger is the death knell for this one.
Canes are the surprise packet so far and will extend the Saders misery in this one and so the leaderboard will show Saders at 0 & 4.
Fearless Prediction: Canes by 9
Referee: James Doleman Assistant Referees: Jono Bredin, Fraser Hanno
Friday 15 March 7:35 pm AEDT – Melbourne Rebels v Queensland Reds at AAMI Park, Melbourne, on Stan Sport
News from rugby.com.au that Rebels coach Kenny Loggins has used The Pone Express as Dirty Harry Wilson at this week’s training, such is the form and danger that Dirty Harry presents to the Rebels side.
The Reds have made a number of changes that look to be about rest and rotation, although Harry McLaughlin-Phillips is one player I am keen to watch from the get-go. And Jordan of Nazareth returns from injury via the pine.
Everywhere you look there are some terrific forward match-ups. The Rebs have Nella Tupou starting and they will need every piece of his efforts as Peni Ravai has been outstanding for the Reds and Zane Nonggorr has also played very well for a young prop. Australia’s best two #6s this season in Liam Wright v Lukan Solakaia-Loto (although at lock for this one). Josh Canham v Uru and Smith (another unsung hero for the Reds). There is size and quality across both sets of piggies.
Having said that, even if honours are shared across the piggies, the Reds backs are a more cohesive, dangerous and settled outfit and to quote Nutta, the Reds forwards will get the victory. Their backs will determine by how much.
Fearless Prediction: How much will be Reds by 15.
Referee: Nic Berry Assistant Referees: Matt Kellahan, George Myers
Friday 15 March 10:00 pm AEDT – Western Force v Moana Pasifika at HBF Park, Perth, on Stan Sport
The Force are at home and in front of their loyal ‘Sprinkling of Blue” fans for this one. I commented on our Thursday pod that to judge the Force on the ladder would not be fair nor indicative of the fact they had been in every game before late fade outs.
To that end, I’m suprised that The Lip is on the pine this week for Issak Fines-Leleiwasa. While an IFL fan, I think The Lip would prove useful with his kicking game at sapping some of the big units in the MP side and constantly turning them round. But Cron is nothing if not a smart coach.
The MP boppers make their way across to the Western Frontier after a so-so performance against the Rebels. A home game, and a travelling opponent, the BIG question will be, is a Force lead big enough to close out the final 20 when the pine riders enter the fray? Maybe that’s why Maitland’s finest, Mr White, is there to lead his charges home.
Fearless Prediction: Force. Just. By 5
Referee: Graham Cooper Assistant Referees: Jordan Kaminski, Ben Jones
Saturday 16 March 2:35 pm AEDT – Highlanders v ACT Brumbies at Forsyth Barr Stadium, Dunedin, on Stan Sport
Will the real ACT Brumbies please, please stand up.
I’ve banged on enough about the un-Brumby Brumbies so far this year. They seem to lack the cohesion and pack mentality of years gone by. I’d also suggest that the Ponies don’t go from being a very very good side to a poor one, but they do need to rediscover their muscle and mojo, and soon.
Fearless Prediction: Having said that, the Highlanders are at home, more settled and waiting in ambush . Landers by 12, but happy to be wrong.
Referee: Ben O’Keeffe Assistant Referees: Stu Curran, Jackson Henshaw
Saturday 16 March 5:05 pm AEDT – Chiefs v Fijian Drua at FMG Stadium, Hamilton, on Stan Sport
The Saders got suckered into ‘Fiji-ball’ last week. Add in heat, humidity, injuries and a lack of confidence and it was all over, red rover. The Chiefs won’t make the same mistake and will be more ruthless. Cooler conditions, at home and in form, the Chiefs will be a special for this one.
Fearless Prediction: Chiefs by 12+
Referee: Dan Waenga Assistant Referees: Paul Williams, Mike Winter
Saturday 16 March 7:35 pm AEDT – NSW Waratahs v Blues at Allianz Stadium, Sydney, on Stan Sport and the Nine Network
A litany of injuries to Tahs hooking ranks sees a heap of tactical changes made by coach Coleman in an effort to pair experience with rawness. But will it be enough?
Fearless Prediction: No comment
Referee: Jordan Way Assistant Referees: Matt Kellahan, James Palmer
And We’re Back.
Adding to this weekend’s rugby smörgåsbord Super Rugby Women is back in 2024. There’s a real buzz around women’s rugby this season and rightly so. The Wallaroos had a terrific second half to 2023 with wins against France and Wales. They looked fitter, more highly skilled and more cohesive as a side. Jay Tregonning left the side in good shape for the future. With the arrival of English legend Jo Yapp to take over the coaching mantle I expect to see a continuation of growth from our Wallaroos.
But first, you have to earn the spot and to that end I believe we’ll see an even higher standard 2024 SRW competition.
Team News courtesy rugby.com.au
Friday 15 March 7:30 pm AEDT – Western Force v Melbourne Rebels at HBF Park, Perth, on Stan Sport
Smart move by the Force administration to put their players on 2 year contracts for certainty and professionalism. Having said that the Force are probably a fraction behind the other states in their rugby journey and the Rebs should be too strong up front and get the lollies here.
Fearless Prediction: Rebels by 12
Saturday 16 March 5:00 pm AEDT – NSW Waratahs v ACT Brumbies at Allianz Stadium, Sydney, on Stan Sport.
They may have lost one of my faves in Grace Hamilton, but they welcome back Emily Chancellor from overseas as well as skipper, Plucka Duck, now injury free. The Tahs will be disappointed in their last two campaigns. Pacesetters during the regular season, they’ve faded when it matters most. But not this year. They look to be a formidable side and any side to have the rampaging Eva Carpani on the pine must be doing alright. Watch for Eva to be among the world’s best in 2024. Her form in H2 of ’23 was special, really special. Size, grunt and skills that kills.
Keep an eye out for young 16yo Waiaria Ellis to make a debut off the pine too. Skipper Plucka described Waiaria’s skills and athleticism as ‘she’s actually insane’.
The Ponies, while always competitive, aren’t as settled as this Tahs side and will find it a long day at the office.
Fearless Prediction: Tahs by 19 and some joy for Tahs fans this weekend.
Sunday 17 March 2:35 pm AEDT – Queensland Reds v Fijian Drua at Ballymore Stadium, Sydney, ad-free, live and on demand on Stan Sport
The Reds were beaten finalists last season and I understand the QRU have been actively funding and professionalising their SRW outfit and they appear to be the ones to push ladder-leading status this season.
I admit to knowing very little about the Drua, other than they are traditionally slow starters to their campaign.
Fearless Prediction: Reds by 12.
Good read from Niles Worthington on rugby.com.au about five SRW players to watch.
Hey Hakarena.
Oi. Sheep shaggers, enough already. There was a time where the haka, even to us Oz fans, was a mythical and revered call to action. A summoning of spirits to help you usually roll straight over the top of us, or most opponents for that matter. But nowadays? Not so much.
Here’s what a typical week looks like in my life:
- Scaffold delivery to my place: haka
- Buying a frozen chook at the deli (can’t afford Coles or Woolies – apparently they feed their chooks gold plated pellets): haka
- Driving past a paddy wagon: hear a haka
- Stop/Go operator at traffic works: haka
- Three Kiwis driving a Benz, otherwise known as ‘repeat offenders’: haka
- Greeting council labourers: haka
- Collection of scaffold from my place: haka
It’s bloody endemic and the hakarena has lost its impact. It’s over used, over dramatised and ensconced over here. Now stuff.co.nz reports you’ve got politically motivated and or boycotted hakas everywhere as well. And ol’ one-nut himself, Sir Buck somebody, is calling for more as a ”platform for them (players) to say something”.
Here’s a question: is there a haka that translates to ‘enough bloody hakas already’? Or maybe one that translates to ‘look, we’re really sorry about the other hakas, here’s a traditional haka reserved for special occasions, haka’.
I’m confused enough already. After 40 years of playing and watching, I still don’t know who ‘Arty’ is or why they cut their own throats at the end of the other haka they use?
It was once great theatre, not often seen and only rolled out for special, worthy occasions. They were emotionally charged, combative and a true invitation to battle. Now? They’re politically motivated protest dances about the cost of milk, or governments, or year 3 spelling tests. They’re bloody everywhere and they have lost their mystique and wonder and, for me, suffer a fading respect.
Maybe they might go back to being what they were once, revered and respected. Cause right now, from where I sit, they can just about phaka right off.
Friday’s Goss with Hoss.
Cliffhanger
With 85 different permutations in this weekend’s final 6N round it will make for compulsory viewing and again, STAN, thank you for the 30 minute mini replays, they’re a godsend to those among you too lazy to get up and watch live.
Get your 6N fill at planetrugby.com
Ranking makes you go blind.
Just like Mumma Cartwright always said, ‘this ranking business will make you go blind, Hoss’. So far down the column did I have to strain my eyes to find the Wallabies ladder position.
Ok, so there’s some solace in the fact the Wallabies ain’t played for a while, but when we do, we’ll be starting waaaaaaaay back in the current World Rankings. And food for thought: the players who’ll make up the FUKIRs tour are currently ranked #2,#5, #6 and #8th. I mean Italy is above us. Italy! Any half decent rugby nation should beat them, right?
The Shaky Isles alright!
Flattered.
Trust Friday’s Rugby News to be leading the charge to a brave new rugby frontier yet again. It appears even the Super Rugby Chair is a fan. Why wouldn’t he be? stuff.co.nz huz more.
North Star at France?
Welsh rugby star George North has called time on his international career confirming this weekend’s 6N match to be his last in the Welsh jersey. The 31yo, 14 year, 120 cap veteran is off to French rugby next season. With a CV of four RWCs, two Lions tours and 6N grand slams to his name who would begrudge the big unit a final win and a few seasons of euro and shiraz to wind out his rugby days.
For us Ozzy fans, who’ll forget his bible-thumping carry during the 2013 Lions Tour!
Classic. Go well Mr North, and congratulations.
Welcome Aboard.
G&GR welcomes a new writer over the weekend to cover club rugby in the QPRQ, including country rugby. Tune in Sunday for all the details around Randwick’s certain win in the Club Rugby Championship. With one Kurtley Beale rumoured to be playing from the pine. How’d you like to be the player who makes way? Too many gags, too little time.
Until nest week. Come on Aussies, and go the Tahs.
Hoss – out.
