Before the match in Round 2 Pfitzy and I had a face-off about the match. Although the Waratahs scratched out a lucky win in the rugby, I was the winner of the face-off according to good judges: my dog and the bloke next door
Pfitzy had readers all over the country nodding off as he brought out the Harbour Bridge and the Opera House. Pathetic as it was, the bloke did a good job with the shoddy material he had to work with; so I thought in only fair to offer him a re-match
Waratahs are going to win
by “Pfitzy”
It has been wet, wet week here in Sydney, with meteorological records and public transport being broken by the fury of Mother Nature. But if you think that’s bad, wait until Rebels fans arrive.
“Call that rain?”, they’ll say, “In Melbourne our rain is at least twice as culturally-aware and has a much better appreciation of neck-beards”.
And don’t get them started on the latest merkin expose at the Melbourne School of Awfully Well Cultured Art And Letting Everyone Know About It (MSAWCAALEKAI).
Melbourne – lot’s of culture – sure
The only cure for this kind of arrogance is a thorough thrashing, and the good news on that front is the Waratahs are the team to do it. Not that its all been unicorns farting rainbows in Sydney, with the team’s consistency is under question.
We can pound the stuffing out of the Brumbies and Hurricanes up front, but seem to be incapable of doing the same to the Force and the Stormers. Don’t know what’s up with that, but I’ve had Cheik on the blower and he seems to think the top two inches are sorted.
And to be perfectly honest, we can’t risk dropping another home game. Particularly to the Rebels who seem to have found a bit of gristle in the last week or so. Culturally superior gristle, maybe? Their pack gave the Brumbies a bit of a working over I hear, so it should be interesting in the mud.
However, the home side put in a very pleasing performance against the table-topping Hurricanes last week, built on the hard defence which underpinned their 2014 title.
So, even with the heavy track, and the supposed might of the Rebels tight five:
Waratahs by 12
Unicorns – have not been farting rainbows for Tahs in Sydney
Rebels are going to win
by “Daz”
Typical Sydney-siders; They try to seem all cool and blasé when talking about the recent storms, then the minute they are alone, they are heads down at bus-stops all over the city.
Their fingers work furiously, as they break twitter trying to one-up each other with idotic hashtags like: #YouKnowNothingAboutWaterCosMyMumIsAMeteorologistAndMyDadIsThor
Pathetic.
And just so you know, Pfitzy, I’ll take a merkin exhibition at a real live museum any day of the week. It sure beats the Sydney contribution to culture and art, which is usually some tosser posting a picture on Instagram of their lunch.
Merkin Valdez – not the kind of merkin Melbourne likes says Pfitzy
Stating that our arrogance can only be dealt with by a good thrashing is yet another brilliantly-mumbled example of the true mindset of your average Sydney-based troll, for it takes a special kind of arrogance indeed to assume your team is going to mop the floor with us.
Having said that, bookies all over the country went into receivership last week after the Tahs got over the line against the ‘Canes, which was a thoroughly unexpected result.
While I am not one to spread rumours (unless I have started them), I have heard that a Royal Commission into match fixing is being seriously considered, which would make the recent issues in the dish-lickers industry seem like a Pink Floyd concert for the Legalise Marijuana lobbyists in comparison.
Waratahs were a good bet last week but not for the bookies
And the Tahs should be a bit worried about the Rebels; the only time we tend to win games lately is away from home. Having stuffed the Brumbies and their supporters back into the Stone Age with vintage Rebels wet-weather football last week, a few drops of acid rain in Sydney is hardly going to dent our confidence.
The Rebels are re-signing players in droves in a sign of dedication and future success expectations, and they are primed for this game. Neither team will want to do anything to trip themselves up, with 4 precious points up for grabs. ANZAC Day in Sydney, rugby, beers and a spirit of fellowship and camaraderie across the country all in one day. Bring it on.
Rebels by 5.
LEAST WE FORGET
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