Renowned political activist and occasional rugby player David Pocock of Australia has spent his Friday night in Auckland chained to one of the goalposts at Eden Park. The action was believed to have been initiated by an unnamed ex-Auckland Blues assistant coach.
“The goalpost is made of a very rare endangered timber. We wanted to enlist the services of David to protect this rare endangered timber and to highlight its plight to the rest of the world.”
Pocock, after hearing the unnamed ex-Blues assistant coaches passionate plea last night, agreed.
“If this is an endangered strain of indigenous national heritage then I feel it is only right to heighten social awareness of this case. I agree to remain chained to this goalpost until public awareness has been raised.”
“The unnamed ex-Blues assistant coach reckoned until about November would be a prudent length of time. I fully agree. No more questions. Oh, could you please point a sprinkler at me for a bit? I need to stay hydrated. Maybe some for the goalpost too. I call him ‘Woody’.”
AAP
