G’day G&GRs. A disappointing evening for Australian rugby fans, but two pretty brutal games that made for entertaining viewing. And I guess, to be honest, it was what we really thought would happen, even though it wasn’t what we hoped would happen. The positive? We get one more week as a centralised squad for the BIL!
So let’s dive into the SRP finals with a game-by-game review, Brisney style. Pour a large cup of the good stuff☕, and let’s talk about the game they play in heaven.
Super Rugby Pacific Semi Finals
Crusaders 21 defeated Blues 14
Crusaders Cling On in Classic to Book Final Berth – Strap yourselves in because finals footy doesn’t get much more nail-biting than this. The Crusaders – those cockroach-like Kiwis who just won’t die – have booked themselves another Super Rugby Pacific Final with a gutsy, grinding 21-14 win over the Blues in the Christchurch chill.
After 86 minutes, 40+ phases, and roughly the same number of heart attacks among the home fans, it was Christian Lio-Willie who finally put the hammer down, diving on a loose pill at the breakdown to ice the game. And thus, the red and black faithful live to fight one more week – and do it at home, no less. But crikey, they made it tough on themselves.
Will Bloody Jordan, Take a Bow – There’s something about finals that brings out the best in Will Jordan. Like clockwork, the All Black back-three wizard went to work with a sensational brace to haul his mob back from the brink. His second meat pie – 13 phases deep into a siege of the Blues’ line – was the nail in the coffin. Ice in the veins, that man. The Crusaders had their backs well and truly to the wall early. Down 14- zip thanks to tries from Mark Tele’a and Rieko Ioane, and Ennor sitting in the bin for a high shot – things looked darker than a Dunedin winter. But they rallied like only the Saders can. Tom Christie muscled over to get them going, then Jordan spun his way over just before oranges to square things up.
Blues Crash and Burn (Again) – The Blues will be kicking themselves all the way back to Auckland. They had the territory, they had the pill, and they had over 40 bloody phases inside five metres to equalise. But they couldn’t land the killer blow. Injuries up front didn’t help, with hooker Kurt Eklund forced into the front-row after a front-row wipeout. That’s not ideal at the best of times, let alone in a finals cauldron against the most ruthless pack in Super Rugby history.
Hoskins Sotutu’s head clash with Fihaki left him sidelined, and while the Blues had one last hurrah in extra time, they just couldn’t crack the Crusaders’ line. Tele’a came close. But not close enough. And then it was Lio-Willie, like a seagull on a hot chip, diving on the ball to end it all.
So what now? – The Crusaders move into their gazillionth final (well, okay, 18th), which will be the last hurrah at Apollo Projects Stadium before they finally get a shiny new home.
Three Things We Learned
1. Will Jordan = Big Game Hunter – If he’s not already, Jordan is fast becoming the most clutch finisher in world rugby. Finals footy? Pressure cooker? No worries, mate. Give him half a sniff and he’ll break your heart.
2. The Crusaders’ DNA is Finals DNA – You can’t kill them. You can’t shake them. Down 14-nil, missing key forwards, and still they find a way. Culture? Mentality? Dark arts? Whatever it is, it works. Every. Bloody. Time.
3. The Blues Need a Killer Instinct – Talent isn’t the problem – they’ve got it in spades. But 40+ phases camped on the line and not a single point to show for it? Finals footy is about seizing the moment, and the Blues blinked when it mattered.
Chiefs 37 defeated Brumbies 17
Chiefs Cook Brumbies as McKenzie Puts On a Clinic – Well, folks, the Brumbies’ fairytale run has come to a shuddering halt in the Waikato, as the Chiefs ran out 37-17 winners in a game where Damian McKenzie reminded everyone why he’s worth his weight in golden boot polish. The mop-topped maestro put on a masterclass — 22 points, a try assist, a try-saver, and probably sold hotdogs at half-time while he was at it.
It was a frustrating night for the Brumbies, who came out swinging early but were slowly strangled out of the contest by a Chiefs side that looked like they’ve been simmering all season for a crack at revenge in Christchurch. Yep, we’re getting a Crusaders v Chiefs Final… again. Just like 2023. Yawn.
The Arm Wrestle Begins – Things actually looked promising, early doors, when Tupou Vaa’i took a leaf out of the NRL’s playbook and got binned for a clumsy high shot on Billy Pollard. Not one to miss an invitation, Pollard dusted himself off and promptly drove over in a classic Brumbies rolling maul special. Textbook Canberra stuff. But that was about where the textbook ended. Noah Lolesio went off for a failed HIA, and with him went a fair bit of attacking direction. Enter Emoni Narawa, who scooted from the base of the ruck and left the Brumbies’ defence looking like they’d just met each other in the car park.
McKenzie Takes Over – From there, it was The DMac Show. The man couldn’t miss with the boot, banging over penalties like he was down the local club comp on a windy Wednesday night. Corey Toole kept things interesting, thanks to some brilliance from Jack Debreczeni, who’s still doing the rounds like a rugby journeyman DJ. A neat little chip, Toole turns on the afterburners, and the Brumbies were back in it, trailing by just one.
But the Chiefs, with their tails up and their attack humming, kept nudging away. McKenzie slotted more three-pointers, while Toole tried to play one-man army with a superb solo try that featured him roasting George Dyer and steamrolling McKenzie. That little man has serious mongrel. Unfortunately, that was the last real sniff for the men from the capital.
Chiefs Step It Up, Brumbies Fade – The Brumbies’ defence started to fall apart like a meat pie in the rain. Quinn Tupaea busted through and gave Narawa a walk-in for his second. By now, McKenzie had hit his sixth penalty, and Josh Jacomb iced the cake after DMac put him through a gap wider than the Australian conference. Tom Wright almost dragged the Brumbies back into it with a brilliant run, only to be denied by McKenzie, who somehow morphed into a flying squirrel to save a certain five-pointer. That, ladies and gents, was the nail in the Brumbies’ season.
Three Things We Learned
1. Damian McKenzie is a cheat code -Seriously, someone check his boots for magnets. Whether it was with the boot, ball in hand, or flying through the air to stop tries, he was everywhere. The Brumbies had no answers, and even the Crusaders should be nervous.
2. Brumbies’ Plan B is MIA – Once the maul dried up and Lolesio went off, the Canberra crew looked like they’d run out of petrol. Toole was electric, but he can’t do it alone. Against top-tier Kiwi opposition, you need more than just set-piece domination.
3. The NZ Final is here to stay – It’ll be Chiefs vs Crusaders again. Not since Game of Thrones has a final series felt so inevitable. Aussie teams are improving, sure, but there’s still a serious gap when the whips are cracking.
Super Rugby Pacific Grand Final
Unfortunately, for the Australian teams (and, to be honest, the other Kiwi Teams too), Super Rugby has resumed its normal programming, and we are back in Christchurch for a Grand Final. Last year’s season is now a distant memory.
The only good news out of it is that, as Aussie fans, we get to watch as neutrals and watch the two best Kiwi teams for the season beat the Scheiße out of each other. However, overall, I think the Australian competition has improved. And here we are, looking forward to the next Super Season.
In the meantime, here comes the BIL. Over to you, GARGs! Have at it!
