NSW GPS – Round 10 Preview

Pickets, pies and pig-skins

by “Gary Owen III”

The last battle of this year’s campaign pits the Shoremen against the “College of knowledge” at Northbridge.

Rumour has it that the old picket fence surrounding the Northbridge A ground was once the same fence that adorned the SCG. So it’s fitting that Saturday should resemble Jane McGrath day at the SCG as the hordes of pink (and blue) supporters come to cheer on their team (I know it’s cerise – settle down).

Despite not having a win this year, the Shore faithful will again turn up in numbers and they should be commended for their passion and resilience this season – I know their team appreciates it.

With the award winning Northbridge Pies on board, the crowd should be satisfied early and ready for a great afternoon of rugby. The early games should be tight and entertaining.

The Shore boys will be looking to topple the undefeated Joeys 3rd XV and possibly give Grammar a sniff of a joint premiership (Grammar play High). For Shore, watch for big games from Lachie Miller and Will Collard, whilst for Joeys Alex Crotti and Jacob Patmore have been getting big wraps of late.

The 2nd XV match sees a similar situation with Joeys leading the competition undefeated and Shore looking to take a final big scalp for the season. Shore has a couple of outside backs return from 1st XV duties with Hamish Sheehan and Harry Cudmore as players to watch. Whilst Joeys will be looking to finish off their season and take the outright premiership. A loss here and a win by New could see the spoils shared. Watch for Cameron Fazzari and Ryley Angles-Corke here.

For the big game, Shore has a couple of players returning from injury (although they still have a big number of players unavailable) and should be able to field their strongest line-up for a few weeks. Whilst the Joey’s lads are feeling a bit of the casualty pain with injury to Lochie Simpson seeing him join Horton, Wright and co on the benches.

Last time these teams met, it was the power game of Joey’s up the middle which caused havoc and then they spun the ball wide and Tom Wright carved up his opposition when given time and space.

Shore gave away early points and never managed to get back into the game, so the first 20 minutes will be vital for them. If they can reproduce their first 20 minutes last week against Newington, then they will give their supporters some hope of a strong performance.

Joey’s on the other hand will be unhappy with their second half last week as they let the Kingsmen back into the game and their scrum came under some huge pressure without Horton (whom should again be sidelined after copping a concussion in round 8 against Newington). So it could be a different game this time round – but Joey’s will start as quite firm favourites.

Players to watch – Fergus Bragg and Lachie Patrick will provide the starch and spark for Shore. And for Joeys keep an eye on scrummie Will Wennerbom and live-wire winger Yirrbi Jaffer-Williams who has been bagging pies all season (and we all know Northbridge does the best pies).

Thanks for the memories

    by “anon”

2015 has been an interesting season by the keyboard warriors.

Azzuri started off strongly in the pre-season popping veins and furiously batting away suggestions that the Kings boys early victory over Scots was lucky, or that in fact Scots have so much money in their rugby program, they have another team being warehoused? “Haters are gonna hate”, he said channeling Taylor Swift. But the inside scoop is that although Azzuri talks a big man’s game, he was in fact was the half back in the 10ths at TKS in 1976. After the TKS season ended with a fizzle after showing so much promise, he is now channeling the Beatles “Let it Be”.

Crackerjack has been diagnosed with schizophrenia, or is indeed the man with two hats with his love/hate relationship with various posters having cheap shots at the New boys. He has turned the corner and become a ‘like’ getter. If only GAGR had introduced the Unlike button earlier or the mute button. Now he can’t stop waxing lyrical about the ground staff, the meat pies, the carefully folded doilies on the afternoon tea plates. 180 degree turnaround with pike.

Rich_E is another poster talking a big game but is a povo student who hasn’t let go of GPS footy. He thinks that blogging on GAGR is good practice for sports journalism or was that Nectar?

Inside Shoulder lost interest when prodigal son blew his knee apart, but made fleeting sorties on the scholarship thread just to keep up his match practice in the sparring department. In his former playing days, he was a ref.

Hugh Jarse is living vicariously through Kim Kardashian’s posterior but hasn’t quite cracked the secret to making $$$$ from butt selfies and let’s hope it stays that way. Just don’t buy the selfie stick Jarse.

SDW is drawn to the GPS thread like a fly to a, well you know the rest. Makes a quick dart in, says something way controversial or takes the thread off topic talking about the class of 2030 who have just been conceived and are already on the Shore waiting list.

Beard is a phoney and only has a moustache and a pencil one at that. Seen lurking around Jack’s bar looking for the rebuild contract and talks to anyone about the For and Agin stats for the Thirsty Thirds.

Nectarphiliac is warned that even Hamlet can’t procrastinate forever. Open your books son, the HSC is just around the corner.

RM2 fought the good fight against the last bastions of paternalistic dominance, the Rugby forum, but was eventually self yellow carded for inciting violence and besides was bored and had run out of alcohol. RM2 is actually a man in a woman’s body and is the keeper of the Joeys scoreboard where time runs quicker when the home side is winning and slower so they can make it up. One eyed Joeys supporter – aren’t they always.

Natellis has taken the site shut down badly and taken his bat and ball and gone back to Mumma where he still lives after 20 years.

Not In Straight was so traumatised by the poor showing of the Shore Men, he had to create a tipping comp to stay in with the cool kids on the site. After that wasn’t working with 0 from 10 (or 0 from 9 at the time of writing) and realising that Shore wasn’t doing that badly in 2nds and 3rds (when compared to the 1sts), introduced tipping for the 2nds and the 3rds. Nice subterfuge NIS.

Brainstrust – the wise old man of View has run a strong campaign over the years but I fear will move on once the season is over. “2014 shoulda, coulda been ours if it wasn’t for those kilt wearing nancy boys of Bellevue Hill” he cries into his beer at the Longueville Hotel. If only View weren’t so mean they too could have their very own Jacks Bar. Watch him pop up on the 2016 Colts thread as Mr Gordie McHugh but just don’t sing that “happy” song.

The Has Been has just been re-signed by the Waratahs as head coach, scrum coach, defence coach, attacking coach and goal kicking coach, but still the Shore school hierarchy won’t use his coaching services preferring to use Miss Smith who likes watching Gossip Girl, knows nothing about Rugby and teaches remedial English (hang on there is no remedial English at Shore because they all go to Newington). But hey, the boys have lots of spirit and good trust funds, so who cares about Rugby – they will soon be running the show. Better increase the donation next year Has Been – and brush the dust off the blazer – and not the one you wore to Australia Day celebrations.

Saving the best for last ‘Azzuri” has given his preview of Kings v Scots, recorded some time ago.

.