Analysis

The Chewsday Chew

The Chewsday Chew

Konnichiwa, Comrades and welcome to Episode 31 of the Chewsday Chew.

I’ve been trying to psyche myself up and pull together a multipart series on what I feel needs to be done, at multiple levels, to build Australian rugby into the self-sustaining power house for future world domination that it could and should be.

However, it’s no-where near even close to a publishable state. In fact, right now it’s little more than a series of poorly written diatribes, some undeveloped thoughts and a few mad conspiracy theories.

And whilst to some that may make it perfect fodder for publishing on this erstwhile site right now, I would prefer that I sharpen its disconnection from the bounds of reality a little more before inflicting it on folk en masse.  

So, after reflecting on last week’s comments to my “Other Sports XXVIII” piece, I thought to continue the vein this week with another team selection. But instead, this time I will shift my focus to a different group of participants and contestants.

And so to that end, this week I bring you a XXIII of modern players who can be best summed up as being ‘misunderstood’.

Now, to some, this may seem a familiar comment that raises its head periodically. It was most-recently made topical again after being uttered by multiple New Zealand sympathisers regarding Dane Coles in the context of Pablo Matera refusing to shake his hand after a test match. Allegedly, Monsieur Coles had been rather disagreeable in action and word by the judgement of Monsieur Matera, leading to the Los Pumas stalwart openly refusing what has always been seen as a fait accompli demonstration of post-match ‘cessation of hostilities’ – the shaking of hands – even in the most trying of circumstances.

In the many inches of column space since that were dedicated to that split second of open acrimony, any number of pundits have spoken about how ‘Colsey’ is actually a ‘top bloke’ but often just a little ‘misunderstood’.

Methinks that simply having folk feel they need to come out and use such qualifying terminology about Colsey would likely indicate a generally-accepted position that he is, in-fact, otherwise.

However, I don’t know the fellow, nor any of the people about to be mentioned in-fact, so I can only go off the strength of the statements so-made about him (and the others).

Therefore, this list is not about grubs. It’s not about cheap-shot merchants. It’s not about smart-arses, divers, milkers, whingers, thugs, whiners, loudmouths or other such folk. It’s not even about blokes you may casually swing a shotgun in the general direction of if they came anywhere near your own daughters.

No, this is the “Top blokes, but just a bit misunderstood” XXIII. Make of that as you will…

  1. Ellis Genge (England)
  2. Dane Coles (New Zealand)
  3. Kyle Sinckler (England)
  4. Darcy Swain (Australia)
  5. Pascale Pape (France)
  6. Shannon Frizell (New Zealand)
  7. Anthony Jalonch (France)
  8. Amanaki Mafi (Japan)
  9. Nic White (Australia)
  10. Johnny Sexton (Ireland)
  11. Mike Brown (England)
  12. Owen Farrell (England)
  13. Reiko Ioane (New Zealand)
  14. Manu Tuilagi (Samoa)
  15. Dan Biggar (Wales)
  16. Dylan Hartley (England)
  17. Joe Moody (New Zealand)
  18. Owen Franks (New Zealand)
  19. Tomas Lavanini (Argentina)
  20. Johnny Hill (England)
  21. Danny Cipriani (England)
  22. Kurtley Beale (Australia)
  23. Wille Le Roux (South Africa)

Coach – Richard Loe

Manager – Martin Johnson

Spiritual Advisor – Gerard Cholley

Or am I wrong? Who else was more misunderstood? Who have I misunderstood?

Analysis

Underfed front-rower with no speed or ball skills. Started playing footy in the 70's and still going. Can't remember the last time I passed on a ball, beer or karaoke mike. Motto - "Meat and potatoes first. Then gravy. And you don't put gravy on the plate first Boy."

More in Analysis