Most of your criticism is pretty sound. But the expectations seem a little high considering rugby is just a game that can only be reffed subjectively.
My expectation of their performance? All I really want is for them to be consistent, then we could start hoping for accuracy.
The refs are fairly consistent at the top level. (as much as they can be in such a subjective game)
Consistency is making the same ruling 100% of the time. In a game the ref will pick up most knock ons and they will call up almost any blatant offence. Whenever the refs miss one knock on, or one blatant offence, suddenly everyone cries "INCONSISTENT". Despite the fact that when you look at the big picture, they are making these calls most of the time.
Then comes the "effect" part of the reffing. Sometimes a player off their feet wont cause any harm and they will let it go. Sometimes players going off their feet will be majorly slowing the ball down, and the ref will be calling it for 80 minutes. Consistency and subjectivity just don't mix.
The guys at the top are consistent in the basics, and they perform to the best of their ability when it comes to judging the effect of an offence. I don't like the whole "inconsistent" argument, I don't think it holds much weight. Rugby was created to play for fun, it was never meant to be played professionally. If you want a game that is perfectly officiated, look at Chess. The rules can be objectively measured and it was intended that way.
It's fine to criticize refs. But there will always be stuff to criticize them for, offences occur all the time. Whenever a try is scored, anyone can look back to the last offence the ref didn't pull-up and claim "he caused the try to be scored"...At the end of the day, any of us that have played know that refs don't win or lose games. And these guys at test level get the best refs around. If people still aren't happy, what massive changes to this list of refs would they make? Complaining is pointless if there is no definitive solution.