It was the spring of '72, well, in actual fact, it was sometime in 1991 and grunge rock was king. This young pillock was travelling up and down the west coast of Jesusland to watch bands with names like "Mudhoney" and "Nirvana" and "Steel Pole Bathtub". Anyway, I was about to pilot my fucking enormous Buick station wagon out of a youth hostel in Portland when 3 hippies on the porch asked me where I was going. L.A being the answer, they were to be my companions. Turns out they were "Deadheads". About 3 minutes into our trip the 50 year old Frank Zappa look-a-like in the front seat next to me said he had $5,000 worth of LSD on him. Oh shit. I had never tried any drugs harder than dope. Anyway, he says half a tab should be enough for me. He took 4 tabs. At once. "Developed an immunity" he says. Astonishingly he would continue this pace over the next 4 days (was it 4?), sliding the papers under his tongue like they were motherfucking tictacs.
Me being the designated driver (no way I was letting these hippie drug addicts drive my car) I was a wee bit concerned as to how this infamous hallucinogenic would affect my ability to drive an automobile. I resolved to just focus hard and Holy Shit Suddenly Everything suddenly became fucking hilarious. Zappa moustache man said I must've been in a good mood when I popped the tab as your "trip" is determined by your state at ingestion. In an anxious/terrified state at tip-off and you could be in for a hell ride. As evidenced by the homeless-impacted streets of San Francisco some take 1 hit and vanish down a rabbit warren existing entirely within the confines of their own minds, never to return.
After 1 hour I realised that I could not tell if I was driving uphill or downhill. Just could not tell. My muscles had completely locked into position, foot on the gas at an unwavering 52mph and would stay that way for 3 days (or was it 4? Where did we sleep?). None of the hippies said anything about my driving so I must have been going ok. We stopped at a Redwood Forest. We stopped at a beach. We stopped for bare arse photos on a very high bridge. Everything still hilarious. I tentatively progressed up to a tab every few hours (although my concept of "hours" was utterly out the fuckign window there).
As I drove the car I thought I would have to think of an analogy of what an LSD trip is like. To explain it to my mum later. I mean, to my cronies later. The best I could come up with was you're sitting in a stationary car, at a train crossing, the trains are roaring by continuously, the car is in neutral, you have your foot flat to the floor, with the engine screaming, and you feel fantastically happy.
Anyway, no idea where this is going or who this "KHUNT" guy is but drugs can be fun.
