Cringeworthy Kearns/Martin moments.....minutes......hours......
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Bruce Ross
Ken Catchpole (46)
While I always appreciate getting a tick of approval from the aficionados of satire, it is a source of joy for me in my dotage that even when I strive to stretch the boundaries of absurdity there is always the possibility that someone might take my scribblings literally.
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Inside Shoulder
Nathan Sharpe (72)
Hugh Jarse
Rocky Elsom (76)
Because it takes the fun out of it, especially when another poster bites on the bait.
Paddysboy
Stan Wickham (3)
Damn it. Got me. I really shouldn't post things after a certain amount of bourbon.
Hell West & Crooked
Alex Ross (28)
Kearns, Clarke and Kafer were commentators for the Brumbies - Crusaders game the other night, and they were acceptable and non-distracting... You don't expect to agree with every word they say, just not to be annoying or detract from the game...
Martin is appallingly annoying. Jonathan Davies is annoying - and distracting... Just get rid of Martin, and all will be acceptable - But BEFORE he goes, I demand that someone at FOX be put in the chair and made to explain what the hell they were thinking!
Martin is appallingly annoying. Jonathan Davies is annoying - and distracting... Just get rid of Martin, and all will be acceptable - But BEFORE he goes, I demand that someone at FOX be put in the chair and made to explain what the hell they were thinking!
Hell West & Crooked
Alex Ross (28)
Gordon Bray is like an old chair... Its a familiar old chair, but it was never really ever, a Good Chair.
Scoey
Tony Shaw (54)
I'm really looking forward to sitting in that old chair but for a while. It will be good to have him call the games again for a while. It may have something to do with the fact that Bray commentated at a time when the Wallabies were going great. Full to the brim with exceptional players. Whatever it was, I loved it. 
Hell West & Crooked
Alex Ross (28)
I would take Bray over Martin, every day of the week - but that is not giving Mr. Bray a great deal of praise...
He's a trip back to that old amateur Rugby Match Of the Day on ABC television on a Sunday Afternoon. standing in the rain at some muddy, wet godforsaken suburban rugby pitch, trying to give a round-up while the ABC gophers scrambled round him to roll-up the cables and get inside for a beer... It was fun then... but I don't want to go back there.
He's a trip back to that old amateur Rugby Match Of the Day on ABC television on a Sunday Afternoon. standing in the rain at some muddy, wet godforsaken suburban rugby pitch, trying to give a round-up while the ABC gophers scrambled round him to roll-up the cables and get inside for a beer... It was fun then... but I don't want to go back there.
Scoey
Tony Shaw (54)
Yeah I couldn't believe it! It was quite ridiculous at some stages!
Also I hadn't seen that game before and thought the red card and 4 yellow cards was pretty funny! When Stu recommended the 4 yellows the ref said, four yellows? Are you serious?! Haha!
terry j
Ron Walden (29)
the bloke on the other touch line, what was his name? Was he not the one who in one game gave, dunno, five yellow cards as he lost control and then never seemed to get a game after? (maybe this was in his subconscious that day and became his benchmark for tough refereeing?)
Yeah, was pretty funny when he responded to stu's recommendation.
Yeah, was pretty funny when he responded to stu's recommendation.
Ash
Michael Lynagh (62)
Do you mean Stu Dickenson? Handed out 3 yellows plus a red (which was actually two yellows to the same player) in an all Kiwi derby in 2011. Said something like "you are ruining my game" to the teams, or something to that effect, due to the messy breakdowns. That caused a bit of a fan backlash. He retired that year, if I recall correctly.
edit: no, you are right! That game I mentioned was Dickenson, but the quote I remember was from Goddard from 2009 where Goddard gave like 5 yellows and a red in a Kiwi v SA game.
maxdacat
Nicholas Shehadie (39)
Can we just have a rule that if they're sick they don't turn up to work....can't quite remember who it was, Phil Kearns in the Rebels-Chiefs game who ruined the already piss-poor commentary with his nasty croaky voice.
Oh and how about they grow the f@ck up and ditch the nicknames.
Oh and how about they grow the f@ck up and ditch the nicknames.
Hell West & Crooked
Alex Ross (28)
What was odd about that - aside from the fact that Kearns actually came across as 'enebriated' as much as he did sick - was that No-One in the management - the producers etc, actually had the responsibility to stand up and tell him that it was not appropriate for him to croak-away on the air for an hour and a half... I noticed his fellow commentators did not help him much - even inviting him to introduce the Teams! Kearns himself normally shows a better standard of judgement than this - but it is actually up to his production team to say "Cannot".
This to me is further evidence that FOX just sign these blokes on each decemeber, and don't listen to them again until their contract is up... Kerry Packer would have had Kearns, the Producer, AND his Sports Director for Breakfast - griilled slowly - had it happened on one of HIS broadcasts...
Its odd how when Australian Television tries to do 'Bloke-ey' type of stuff, it always ends up with the '15 year-old schoolboy' version of the strain... I cite the Footy Show - both Codes, as my evidence.
Greg Martin was the low-point in the worst Rugby Union Broadcast 3-some I have ever heard, during last weeks' Force-Reds match.
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